太傻超级论坛's Archiver

tesolchina 发表于 2008-7-6 18:52

【黄鹤归来】200810G作文批改专帖Argument

[size=4]Argument相对来说比issue要简单,但时间的限制更严格。这个批改帖主要针对高频和难题,希望网友在题库中选择经常考和难度较大的题目来写。以下是格式的要求:[/size]
iz$Tt }0{9l [size=4][color=#0000ff][quote]
2rm&IiiW%n*} C#s|tiS
[size=4][color=#0000ff]考试时间[/color]: 十天内考的请注明,将优先处理
8L'xH"@ Ng-e2L [size=4][color=blue]备考情况[/color]:简单介绍自己的备考经历,目前的困难以及希望我批阅的重点。[/size]
8h(e:f5OC0n6k [size=4][color=blue]抄题[/color]:包括题号和原题[/size]:tiLUn voI+{
[size=4][color=blue]字体[/color]:为大家的视力着想,请使用4号字体[/size]
x-m%aX-R*` [size=5][b][color=blue]列大纲[/color]: [color=red]用汉[/color][/b][/size][/size][size=4][size=5][b][color=red]语列出你将要攻击的逻辑谬误[/color][/b][/size]j]"UXuz2OAN)s M
[size=4][color=blue]正文[/color]: 请自行用Word修改拼写、语法;并请身边英语较好的同学检查语病,希望贴上来的文章没有明显语法问题;注明字数。[/size]
*X VVWwK GfO4S | [size=4][color=blue]批阅内容[/color]:攻击点是否全面、结构是否合理、攻击是否合理、语言表达是否清楚。[/size][/size]5InFf4IQKO!cr
[size=4][size=4][color=blue]讨论[/color]:请大家多关注本帖上已经批阅的文章及我的评语并参与讨论,而不仅仅关心自己的文章。相互学习和反省,才能进步。[/size]ytF p.z
[size=4][color=blue]互助[/color]:本服务基于太傻助人自助的精神免费提供,所有建议和意见仅供参考。希望网友觉得有用,并在将来留学深造的路上帮助其他有需要的人。[/size][/size]
n!~s;w7e2S [size=4][/size] Z6\J%lnBd[%?
[size=4]
_S.sM o6`&g t
a,Gm G+q)~ [/size][/quote][/color][/size][size=4]9B*r`h-v
[/size]

henrysbh 发表于 2008-7-6 19:55

[size=4]难道是沙发?[/size] e r{6aXd5_#e+c
[size=4]8月4号考~[/size]F0Jm|TE
[size=4][size=4][size=12pt]15.Over 80 percent their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol [/size][font=宋体][size=12pt]论断:[/size][/font][size=12pt]Old Dairy Industries[/size][font=宋体][size=12pt]的销量可能会大幅减少,利润也无疑会降低,所以建议他该卖股份了,其他人也别入股进来。因为他大部分的产品都是高脂肪高卡路里的,而如今低脂肪产品很多,人们也有降低脂肪和卡路里摄入的愿望,为此他还引用了一个调查,表明有[/size][/font][size=12pt]80%[/size][font=宋体][size=12pt]的人是这样的。[/size][/font][/size][/size]Yd M4[0m$wm h%\&{
[font=宋体][/font] NlX {8g|$}f
[size=4][font=宋体][size=6][color=red][b]请抄英语原题[/b][/color][/size][/font]/T&W#B|6f+B

w1o[HI;iEl [/size]
E&Y5F1d K%G3@$_lT&z [size=4][color=black][size=12pt]提纲:1、解题,引下文[/size][/color][/size] z-Rv Iq5n
[size=4][color=black][size=12pt]2、Survey值得怀疑[/size][/color][/size]
3pi"Sw'[T `zQ [size=4][color=black][size=12pt]3、对于OD盈利下降的预测没得到证明[/size][/color][/size]
[cp9[E@tS [size=4][color=black][size=12pt]4、Profits受多方面影响[/size][/color][/size]0v4Or,B(Sh]Bk&]
[size=4][color=black][size=12pt]5、ending[/size][/color][/size]
!QS~-~+OF,a y9y6c [size=4][color=black][size=12pt][size=12pt][color=#000000][font=Times New Roman][size=4]In the newsletter, the advisor recommended that investors should sell their shares or not to purchase stock in Old Daily Industries due to that this company currently marketed high fat and cholesterol food staff in majority, which opposed the tendency that mass client needed that demonstrated in the recent survey. In addition, the advisor also indicated that low-fat products abounded in many food stores, thus, the sales of Old Daily would unquestionably diminished in consequence. However, the argument relies on inadequate reasons and assumptions, which was specious in many aspects.[/size][/font][/color][/size]2\o7V"J)ys+Dy+L
[size=12pt][color=#000000][font=Times New Roman][size=4]
aXuA:F*Xb The first venerable viewpoint showed in the argument is the recent survey. On this inaccurate survey, 80% respondents expressed their desire to reduce their intake of foods containing fats and cholesterol. However, the advisor fell to provide plenty of information of the survey, such as the quantity of sample, types of surveyors and area of the survey. We have no idea about the population involved in the survey. It can be 10 people and also 100000, which makes the survey various in quality and reliability. Furthermore, what if all the surveyors are overweight group or people who extremely concerned health and dietetics? It seems like that 80% percent is relatively lower in these kinds of people. While others who concentrate on flavor or taste may care less about fats and cholesterol and decline the percentage of the result. Also, the area of the survey did not appeared in the argument and made it doubtable increasingly.[/size][/font][/color][/size],c:O3u!d*e3Ri [
[size=12pt][color=#000000][font=Times New Roman][size=4]/t hewR!x3l R
In addition, the prediction of the drop of Old Daily in sales was uncertified. The advisor considered that with the providing of low-fats food staff, products of Old Daily, which high in fats and cholesterol were in trouble and decreased their profits. However, I deeply disagree with advisor’s perspective. Firstly, although client presented their willingness to cut off fats and cholesterol, it may not really influence the purchasing behavior of them in short period. Second, in long term strategy, Old Daily has a large possibility to look weight healthy food aspect in case of low-fats foods make significant sales in market, or Old Daily probably already did investment or research in this aspect.[/size][/font][/color][/size];K*K_3Y2g!?+`.n
[size=12pt][color=#000000][font=Times New Roman][size=4]
Q)a ^2B(P*B"}g?/N? Meanwhile, it is a common acknowledge that profits were concerned in multiple factors, such as quality, species, brand, sales, marketing, management, etc. Advisor, however, discussing the species aspect only in the argument to question the profits and value of stock of Old Daily Industries is so unfair. A great instance for this application is the successful of MacDonald and KFC in China. Although fast food was published unhealthy to people couples of times and additionally, they cost higher price than equivalent quality Chinese dishes, people, especially teenage ate there frequently. The reason that these two tycoons did brilliant achievements in China is the management, advertising and mature enterprise system. In my opinion, Old Daily has it own opportunity as long as great effort they did to boost sales. [/size][/font][/color][/size]
P(\ eA)^&d"V.Y [size=12pt][color=#000000][font=Times New Roman][size=4]#Y,saS%~9o
Briefly, advisor’s judgment that Old Daily would slump their profits is questioned. Besides the above reasons and assumption, investors should also consider strategy of the company, management and financial situation, etc. From this side, the advisor’s concern for Old Daily basically on the food species and predict of future has zero valuable in consideration. In order to certify the perspective, advisor should provide financial situation, management and other essential information about the company.[/size][/font][/color][/size] gP+~GQk}
字数559,用时1小时多...)S0f8Yc4[o,a(I7_
多谢老师[/size][/color][/size]4c Yb+RAz#L)z
.u3OhW0A7q
[[i] 本帖最后由 tesolchina 于 2008-7-8 19:02 编辑 [/i]]

Dincyfeng 发表于 2008-7-6 21:34

没坐到沙发~~不过还是支持老师:loveliness:

zhanglistar 发表于 2008-7-6 22:58

请老师帮忙改下

[size=4]老师这是我写的argue:[/size]|2J,joN(em{)d
[size=4][/size]
e'{ Nd+O'MReWt:M [size=4]TOPIC: ARGUMENT210 - The following is a letter to the editor of a news magazine. [/size]]"\mML;m|C(K!Zo
[size=4]"Clearly, the successful use of robots on missions to explore outer space in the past 20 years demonstrates that robots could be increasingly used to perform factory work more effectively, efficiently, and profitably than human factory workers. The use of robots in factories would offer several advantages. First, robots never get sick, so absenteeism would be reduced. Second, robots do not make mistakes, so factories would increase their output. Finally, the use of robots would also improve the morale of factory workers, since factory work can be so boring that many workers would be glad to shift to more interesting kinds of tasks."
0n o9bc.xI WORDS: 347          TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 2008-7-5 下午 03:27:59[/size]
Nh@:D`7ZUB$l [size=4]The arguer hold the conclusion that the robots could be increasingly used to perform factory work more effectively, efficiently, and profitably than human factory workers with three reasons stated as above. But the arguer didn't take a convinced conclusion because there are several things which the arguer may neglect, which make the arguer get the wrong result. I will state them one by one as follows.[/size]
}c?'{ Pe:D'b$Dm [size=4][/size]
z&U+t"nr&YB*H [size=4][color=red]第一段要总结整个论证,尽可能把主要的point都写进去。[/color][/size] n:c3GaOY
hSF/g/G$z*d
[size=178%][font=Wingdings][size=70%]v[/size][/font] CO&l0]#nz0X5~:@
[/size]
6M nXh"BUoq [size=178%][size=4][color=red]The author argues that robots should be used in factory work to improve the effectiveness, efficiency and profitability because they have been successfully used in outer space mission in the past 20 years.  To support this conclusion, three major advantages of robots over factory workers are cited: robots do not get sick or make mistakes and may not get bored.  While the suggestion seems plausible on the first glance, the argument is flawed in several respects.[/color][/size][/size]F~!C[k#G

#lS |?q7T@p"F,j
,q-R9j8G6vqG N@5B)bu7I0?
[size=4][color=blue]你的攻击点中没有指出外太空任务和工厂作业的不同性质以及20年的成功未必足以证明机器人的可靠。[/color][/size]
"Hk;^/}1y1X`&K[Q [size=4][color=blue][/color][/size]
w9uJH"]%Jp [size=4][color=blue]As a threshold matter, the author's belief in robots' effectiveness is based on the successful records of the past two decades.  Nevertheless, we may need more data of robots' performance to evaluate how reliable and effective they are in different working environments.  Also, the mission in outer space is obviously different from factory work in many respects.  Even if robots are very shrewd in outer space work, it does not fillow that they can perform well in factories.  [/color][/size]
5ZZ6H?,z4x;T p)U [size=4][color=#0000ff][/color][/size]
q|f X$||*P x [size=4]Firstly, the arguer says that the robots never sick, which is maybe right. Though they are not get sick as human factory workers, they are not always healthy, for example, they must be maintained by the human regularly. Otherwise, they can break down, and can't do anything. [/size]1wQ#H }u.UhK
[size=4][/size]
+wI._#ec fj } f| [size=4][color=red]这里还是应该讨论类似sick的各种情况,但要具体一些[/color][/size]
zxGgD2P#a [size=4][color=blue][/color][/size]
#T%qn+T]*`/m [size=4][color=blue]Even though the robots can function properly in factory as they do in outersapce, the three advantages cited by the author are problematic.  To begin with, although the robots fo not get "sick" in biological terms, they can fail as well due to a variety of reasons such as mechanical problems, power outage or programming bugs.  Therefore, we still have to worry about the "health" of robots and take into account the fact that they might not be able to work 24/7.  [/color][/size]qKk:R b

3Q;Lv7Y5N0K*] vR_?~"S%N

st8mM"t/~E`'@fV [size=4]Secondly, the arguer says that the robots do not make mistakes. But I cannot agree with the arguer that the robots do not make mistakes. Because the robots are not humans, they can't make decisions by themselves as the circumstances changing. They must first be programmed by the human workers,  so they can work properly. [/size]
Q%jn)t!v'f/i*E [size=4][/size] 7o { sN-N5~
[size=4][color=blue]In addition, the author stresses that robots do not make mistakes and reasons that the output should increase as a result.  While the robots may follow the preset instructions faithfully, the author illogically assumes that the programmers and other engineers who "tell" the robots what to do are also error-free.  Even though the robots work perfectly all the time, it does not follow that the productivity would necessarily increase unless the empirical data suggests so.[/color]  [/size]JV;E3[S0k#} ]G

IM8H_ Wzm;eI [size=4][/size][size=4]Thirdly, the arguer asserts that the robots would also improve the[color=red] moral[/color] of factory workers with the reason that factory worker can be so boring that many workers would be glad to shift to more interesting kinds of tasks. I first doubt the source of the assertion that [color=red]factory worker can be so boring[/color] that many workers would be glad to [color=red]shit[/color] ::z8 to more interesting kinds of tasks. Maybe this kind of situation is rare. And we can not get information that they would be glad to shift to more interesting kinds of tasks.[/size]
x O-J{6RE8Td [size=4][/size]
*x.wiz8k!si [size=4][color=red]这里的问题是机器人可能会导致工人的失业,以至人心惶惶,怎么会提高士气?[/color]  [/size]
2R9M*{W WA-u [size=4][color=blue]Finally, when it comes to the possible improvement in workers' morale, the author makes two implicit assumptions: first, there are more interesting job positions available for the workers when the robots take over their jobs; second, the workers in question have the necessary credential and abilities to work on the so-called more interesting tasks.  It is very likely that workers may not find more interesting tasks to work on or may not have the relevant skills.  In that case, the robots would simply threaten the job security of the workers rather than improve their morale.  [/color][/size]|H~:W6SF4O&r.{?'Vvv
[size=4][/size]GD Pe(x/WP7r
[size=4]Moreover, there are other factors that conflict with the arguer's conclusion. For example, the technology which make the robots won't so good to make robots to work in factories instead of human workers. [/size]
9{w.~2a~E:d R [size=4][/size]
#VgFf7y#E)R [size=4]In sum, the arguer get the wrong conclusion that the robots could be increasingly used to perform factory work instead of human workers. From the reasons stated as above, it still needs the human workers to control the robots and the human workers are necessary for factories, not like the arguer stated.[/size](r^ G| m"\8J'k,|d;]
[size=4][/size]
)K*Dp(z8M [size=4][/size]
K J4p-o/q-q&nK ` [size=4]另一篇[/size]$X*h?WmYRQw
[size=4][/size]
*w4V5CMz[s2U{ s [size=4]TOPIC: ARGUMENT151 - The following is a letter to the editor of the Atticus City newspaper. [/size]:m F u:[XT~:T0b
[size=4]"Former Mayor Durant owes an apology to the city of Atticus. Both the damage to the River Bridge, which connects Atticus to Hartley, and the traffic problems we have long experienced on the bridge were actually caused 20 years ago by Durant. After all, he is the one who approved the construction of the bridge. If he had approved a wider and better-designed bridge, on which approximately the same amount of public money would have been spent, none of the damage or problems would have occurred. Instead, the River Bridge has deteriorated far more rapidly over the past 20 years than has the much longer Derby Bridge up the river. Even though the winters have been severe in the past several years, this is no excuse for the negligence and wastefulness of Durant."ueII~
WORDS: 316          TIME: 00:29:02          DATE: 2008-7-6 下午 03:30:10[/size]
\P`F HkZ$i [size=4]The arguer argueed that the former Mayor Durant owes an apology to city of Atticus with the reasons that he was ascuse of negligence and wastefulness stated as above. But the arguer did't give us convincing reasons , and we can't conclude that the former mayor Durant owes an apology to the city of Atticus. [/size]~9Hn(w.l
[size=4]Firstly, the arguer's first reason was that former Mayor Durant was one of the persons who approved the construction of the bridge. Then it is not convincing to say that Mayor was wrong. Because there may be other reasons that cause the damage, even if the problem emergenced 20 years ago. And even if Durant  appoved the other wider and better-designed bridge, how can we know that this plan was better than the former one? How could we know that none of the problems occurred? Maybe after this plan was made come true, it caused the same or more serious problems. [/size]8fn"A!~:J~o2c+_q
[size=4]Secondly, the arguer argues that the River Bridge has deteriorated far more rapidly ove the past 20 years than much longer Derby Bridge up the river, so the former Mayor Durant should take charge. However, the arguer made a mistake in that the bridge deteriorated far more rapidly over the past 20 years, we could not make the conlution that Durant should take charge. It is know that the Mayor could not build the bridge himself, and of course he would sent somebody to build it. And maybe because the man in charge of building the bridge was the most one who should punished. Maybe during building the bridge, he did something wrong.[/size] q'drb"l
[size=4]To sum up, there were other reasons that cause damage to the River Bridge, for example, the design was not perfectly accomplished. So the arguer make a wrong conclution because there is no nesscesarry connection between the former Mayor Durant and the damage to the River Bridge.[/size]D0\8@oo

6DqW W8WE,U dQegmn a
[size=4][/size]7M x#x8N,m*J$N h

!EZ9eO~e'g q [[i] 本帖最后由 tesolchina 于 2008-7-8 21:11 编辑 [/i]]

nizniz 发表于 2008-7-6 23:05

zan  wang hao lao shi
Ek,k.T&sP*`]
F"~x%?'U#\ F 我的作文也快要发上了~::16

flyingjoys 发表于 2008-7-7 00:56

argument

[size=5][color=red][b]你的文章我借来上课用啦。ppt见附件。::z5 [/b][/color][/size],B|@C;k6Z _C
[size=4][/size] z l-RW[Yx(z
[size=4]65.The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States. -W9fZ%?,d0K3oU$O
"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of J!U/b4\8c%L,`
both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."
Op ]Igv'^T
W b8TZRI}8] 很多年来我们的所有连锁店都储备了很多种类的国产奶酪和进口奶酪。然而去年,我们的最新店里五种销量最高的奶酪都是威斯康星出产的cheddar奶酪。而且,最近一次由Cheese of the World杂志所举行的调查显示,其订阅者对于国产奶酪的倾向性越来越高。由于我们公司可以通过限制库存来减少开支,在我们所有连锁店增加盈利的最好方式就是停止贮备很多进口奶酪而主要集中于国产奶酪。
t x0\v_UK^ 去年的数据不能代表今年的趋势;j5NF,{iM
新店的情况不具有代表性 b \Ph5V P
调查不客观
{9q V'q q0i 减少储存并不一定就能提高收益,不是最好的办法[/size]){)TG$in2z
O#x)v7y7F Ms-p Rn
[size=4]The memo concludes that to discontinue stocking the varieties of imported cheese and to concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses is the best way to improve profits in all stores based on two facts; one is that the five best-selling cheeses at the newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin, the other is the survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicating an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. I want to point out that both of them are unreliable to the conclusion.
P4b8\(C2BqX{
\3M6s'r[X Firstly, the last year’s situation can not represent this year’s potential. Irresistibly, the price of the imported cheese would be involved by the world situation and the imported country’s situation. The memo didn’t give us the detail of last year’s situation of cheese globe market. Whether the price change is normal and permanent or just short-dated, we can’t get the information. So the sale can’t be the reliable basement to the conclusion.;U __DO N1oLo

4\8S3OJ~kmA| Secondly, the memo states that the good sale in the domestic c is happening in the newest store whose location are unknown. What make me feel strange is that five of the best sell are the cheddar cheese at the same time, which is a brand of cheese from Wisconsin. It is entirely possible that these newest store are in Wisconsin, which have the benefits in the local location and the attraction to the local consumer. So this is unreliable too.5Z.dhz1lDl
Thirdly, the survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers, who may not the representation of the target customers of the chain stores. Supposing the group who prefers the imported cheese are not the subscribers of this magazine, this survey also can’t be relied on.
zM9i#}^7C!a
O1L ]ulS d0e+R"a] Wrongly equal the reduce expenses to improve profits, the arguer states that limiting inventory of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses is the best way to gain the profits. As I analyzed the possible situation of the great demands about the imported cheese, limiting the inventory may be a great damage to their business. Despite the possibility, decreasing in inventory is also not the vital way to gain the profits. Because we didn’t be told the sale situation of the chain stores, which may have other reasons pose the decreasing sailing in the stores. Without these information, we can’t solve the problem completely. Even concentrating primarily on domestic cheeses can’t help to gain the profits.-B*D:s;X\h2^

oem1j(Kv? Tc So I suggest the president should do more investigation in this year’s global market, which will help to predict the potential more precisely, find the most accurate methods regarding the location and the situation of each chain store.[/size]
3nx8eOts;_
?-{&xY_+^ [[i] 本帖最后由 tesolchina 于 2008-7-8 22:52 编辑 [/i]]

flyingjoys 发表于 2008-7-7 00:57

argument147

[size=4]Argument147"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is to be reserved. The survey asked plays what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."
Na Z W`| V 尽管Whirlwind游戏公司的游戏销量在过去两年中下降了,最近一次对于电子游戏玩家的调查显示这种销售趋势可能会逆转。该调查询问游戏玩家对于一个游戏来说他们所认为的最重要特征是什么。根据调查结果,玩家倾向于那些需要最先进的电脑的,具有活灵活现图象的游戏。Whirlwind刚刚面向10-25岁的人群开展了大力的广告活动来推广若干此类游戏,10-25岁是最喜欢玩游戏的年龄层。这说明Whirlwind公司的游戏销量将会在未来几个猛增。/c N3v,d.Q$W:m-[0}p
提纲:两个根据和推理过程都出了问题K9m8qL i!O8`*BS
不准确的调查:针对人物可能是喜欢图像灵活的玩家,不能完全代表10-25玩家的意见
P,uN2V"K6Z | 询问类调查可能会有言语潜在影响 M`Fj#z
没有给出具体的比例'aF:P,?I(idpcDR
公司的宣传增多与销量增多没有直接关系,关键是宣传效果
)Z+I*T0}:pu;df/a$D 游戏销量下降的因素游戏销量跟广告影响,定价,质量,竞争都有关系。在众多因素中,只加强宣传并不一定能提高销售。6T-o2sI2rc;B.G^
The argument states the conclusion based on the survey aiming to find out the favor of the video-game players and the extensive advertising campaign the company had execute to ingratiate the favor of the people 10 to 25 years old, who are the group most likely to play video games.  I should point out the arguer have make three mistakes in the two basements and the reasoning to draw the conclusionX3c&w0fs
8]jhH0d5Wzf+?LE/v
First, we can’t not tell whether the survey have strictly reflected the reality. On one hand, we can suppose an situation that the preference of the respondents can’t not entirely represents the favor of the people 10 to 25 years old. It was entirely possible that the respondents were mostly the group who liked the action fighting and role playing games, not including other groups such as the one who liked the game using brain, not just playing skills. On the other hand, we can’t get the details of the methods which the survey used. We are told that the survey asked the respondents, not how they asked them. Whether the language unconsciousness imply exist can have a great influence with the conclusion the survey gain from the respondents. Especially, we didn’t attain the proportion showing how many players had preferred the games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers.
-[;Z(Ax(Qj$? i`*pK/[CM
Then, aiming to an introduced extensive advertising campaign, we only know that the number of propaganda had increased, the increasing number didn’t means the directly increasing in the profits, as the quality and the responds about these campaign was not introduced in the statements. If the extent campaign didn’t arouse the interests of the people 10 to 25 years old, it was boring and bad advertised, the profits will not be greatly influenced. Only with great respond the campaign had make, the company have the potential to make money from the new games.dGN%c(W z:O-d1\T

7ZvV-m(P Third, the reasoning of the statement regards the ingratiating to the player as the only reason of the sales, which was totally wrong. The sales decreasing in last two years may be caused by the bad management, high price of their products, bad serve in their shops or the influence of the competence. Now only by the campaign, the arguer ignoring other reasons can’t solve the problem fundamentally.J1s:o6Z e
B0[S9e'o6a:PB
So in my opinion, the company should analyzed the essential reasons of the decreasing in profits and solve them one by one. Make sure the campaign is holding interesting and catching the eyes of the target player.[/size]
)cg6G,I7b*b!Z,fd
UI6I R*o6\2k^1q [[i] 本帖最后由 flyingjoys 于 2008-7-7 01:00 编辑 [/i]]

flyingjoys 发表于 2008-7-7 01:04

情况在ISSUE帖介绍过了,辛苦老师了~~~

kalouling 发表于 2008-7-7 17:54

感谢老师的批阅

时间:还有两个礼拜就考试了,麻烦老师,谢谢
5c6Yh? P9p?Ng&^ 英语程度: 六级500分,恩,相对ISSUE,ARGU要花起码5MIN来审题,并且作文写的很慢,象挤牙膏,这篇用了1小时完成。请给我个大致的分数
f0K3Dii -N*_Vpem8pUsC
题目:ARGUMENT167 - A folk remedy* for insomnia, the scent in lavender flowers, has now been proved effective. In a recent study, 30 volunteers with chronic insomnia slept each night for three weeks on lavender-scented pillows in a controlled room where their sleep was monitored. During the first week, volunteers continued to take their usual sleeping medication. They slept soundly but wakened feeling tired. During the second week, the volunteers discontinued their medication. As a result, they slept less soundly than the previous week and felt even more tired. During the third week, the volunteers slept longer and more soundly than in the previous two weeks. This shows that over a short period of time lavender cures insomnia. ;o'LAK5^9`? Jb [V

x1K5^-n:j ?u 1.insomnia与睡眠的深浅无关 eQHuvC W
2.文章没有对比病人治疗前与后的睡眠质量,也许治疗前后质量没有改观:Z+J@G,Yi/zou6@
3.如果是lavender 起作用,那么效果应该呈现一种递进,但是第二周相对是情况恶化;并且在第一周使用的sleeping medication也是个干扰因素,第三周不知道有没有使用.
r d#l!_ M*_$_ 4.数据问题:相对与医疗调查这种复杂的研究30人太少了;如3周太短;
8bt*s$pheE M8h&T *A folk remedy is usually a plant-based form of treatment common to traditional forms of medicine, ones that developed before the advent of modern medical services and technology.
\v_:Z'Z@ 字数:461         用时:上午 12:30:00          日期:2008-7-5S"LP U@f;KQ1z

4kZ+G,r-d r The editorial asserted that lavender cures insomnia in a short time basing on a cure to 30 persons in three weeks, Sound as it seems, it is absurd when the following unconvincing elements are taken into account.uC o Zy9t+wg
:n9} d3m#Q8]
First, what is a functional logical mistake is that there is no causal relationship between how sound it is in the sleep and cure of the insomnia. Insomnia refers to the situation that people can not sleep normally and always keep awaken. Sounder sleep can indict the development of sleep quantity, which may arises from the less press in the process of cure. The result from the factor of the degree of sound sleep seems untenable. ohhT2]5L

gQ'T&O&V8T o2_ Second, another basic one is that author ignored to contrast the diverse between what happen previous the study and that during the study. Maybe there is no difference when compared to their original sleep quantity. Unless all other factors are ruled out, it is flimsy to access the reliability of the study. D/VL,x#]r]

'dME%]o(v/E}/W Third, if it is the lavender that functions during the cures, the reflection of the patients should keep a kind of consistence to be more satisfied one week after another, nevertheless which is not shown in the article. Contrarily, for the more fatigue the symptom in the second week is more worried than that in the first week. After the second week, there existed a better symptom again,  which , as a matter of fact, are confusing readers. Then there is an exclusive element during the cure, the sleep medicine, which is taken by persons in the first weed, stopped in the second week and whether is taken is implicit in the third week. Chances are that it is the medication that gets rise to a good effect in the first week instead of the lavender. With such a multiple of references in the whole study, the result is untenable. F0r-o"GwCio5C

{FTKaT^ Finally, author failed to give accurate data to support the authenticity of the study. Generally speaking, samples should be statistically reliable. Unfortunately, as quoted in this argument, little sign of such procedure is shown. The number of the patients seems somewhat little as a result of the complication of the study of medicine. Perhaps it is the flavor of the lavender from some patient that leads to relieve of insomnia. Moreover, Three weeks, however, appears to be a rather short period to assure the help from lavender, especially for the insomnia which is hard to deal with. Lacking such specific information, it is fallacious to draw any conclusion.  +C&M xg,A z1U

3DR:r-?m From all the evidence referred, we can safely state that the study is suspected to prove the effect of the lavender. To bolster the statement, it is guaranteed to list more detailed demographic and a more scientific study.
$x,f|(a2^(L }O6M?)@I
[[i] 本帖最后由 kalouling 于 2008-7-10 10:26 编辑 [/i]]

daisong 发表于 2008-7-7 18:03

谢谢老师也希望G友们多多指教

八月一号考:i;Pysag/YK

([P)\/B C8A0i%X\5s0A#A 刚写了几篇argument。感觉把题目中的错找出来之后就没什么可说的了,扩展不了,字数也就不太多了。还有就是只会用一些简单词来写,难词想不起来也不会用,一句话总要想半天,也想不出什么好词,写得也就比较慢了。3Vm YS.^1Y4{/}`
|1et7@ }8W-o^_ {
165.The following appeared in a business magazine.l$c*?#E#j

1p2k%m2s!dVS xY `;G "As a result of numerous consumer complaints of dizziness and nausea, Promofoods requested that eight million cans of tuna be returned for testing last year. Promofoods concluded that the cans did not, after all, contain chemicals that posed a health risk. This conclusion is based on the fact that the chemists from Promofoods tested samples of the recalled cans and found that, of the eight chemicals most commonly blamed for causing symptoms of dizziness and nausea, five were not found in any of the tested cans. The chemists did find that the three remaining suspected chemicals are naturally found in all other kinds of canned foods."
tflD5~5AQbThWG :G*?3b U5f7nY"b1Q
去年由于有大量消费者投诉说产生了眩晕和恶心,Promofoods要求800万罐金枪鱼回收检测。Promofoods下结论说这些罐头根本不含任何有健康危害的化学物质。这一结论基于这样的事实,即Promofoods的化学家测试了回收的罐头样本,并发现8种最常见的导致眩晕和恶心症状的化学物质中,有五种都没有在任何被测试的罐头中被发现。化学家确实发现剩下三种受怀疑的化学物质在所有其他罐头食品中都存在。
C7r/Kn}c 6Rj7U+l\
开头基本抄了遍题,并说他说的有问题。
PU6P[ ~ a 正文部分找了三个错:
C]V7d%T 1。质疑试验及其结果的权威性。a.yH$[BXOY5H
2。可能还有人们未知的导致晕眩的化学元素。
7vX5Xq8A 3。可能那三种化学成分超标了或和金枪鱼反应了。
&Ix)XaE P v3f { 结尾总结上文并提出改进意见。
!j5mT#[QR '@+XFX5yF5Km C
45min    339words;u9a,hr&^,~3[FK
2zrHA"F5Q
Promofoods wants to convince us the cans from Promofoods didn't contain chemicals that posed a health risk. He says the chemists found that five of the most commonly blamed chemicals for causing symptoms of dizziness and nausea were not found in any of the test cans and other three were found in all other canned foods. It seems specious. But the argument is not strong enough to convince us.3j,C@$@V*L4a|

`J1Z&|I+x-Vg First, both the test and the test result are operated by the Promofoods. There is not any legal organization to justify the test and the result or at least Promofoods has not mentioned. So we don't how the tested samples are collected and how the test was made. If the chemists are the staffs of Promofoods, how can we make sure they won't deceive us?D2@h b3[
&gM2^'j@X&l
Second, Promofoods tells us there are eight chemicals the most commonly blamed for causing symptoms of dizziness and nausea. But it is also the thing Promofoods tells us without any evidence. We even don't know what the eight chemicals are. Even though there are eight chemicals like Promofoods says, it is also possible that there is other chemical may cause dizziness and nausea while we don't know.
k:{?'Ho3oM
s pH h'b7Cc t Last, Promofoods tells us the remaining three suspected chemical found in cans of tuna are also found in all other kinds of canned foods. But if the amounts of these three chemicals are much more than the common standard, it will also be risky to health. And there is another possibility that the three chemicals can react with tuna so that only cans of tuna can make people dizzy.
x6n"]!x[+i G)I
B%B y U@~w In sum, Promofoods gives us a specious test and its result to explain his tuna-can didn't contain chemicals that posed a health risk. But the justification of the test should be questioned. And the deduction itself is unsound, too. If he wants to strengthen the conclusion, he should justify the test and tell us more details of the test and take more and different tests to find the truth.

fuchunru 发表于 2008-7-7 18:11

十分感谢

[size=4]ARGUMENT88 - The following appeared in a newsletter about health published in the country of Sauria.[/size]/U-^#c V@5d7q
[size=4]"According to Sauria's leading nutritional experts, a diet high in complex carbohydrates, and low in fat is optimal for good health and longevity. Because this was the diet of the people who lived in ancient Sauria, one would expect them to have had long and healthy lives. Yet the mummified remains of Sauria's ruling classes from two to three thousand years ago show the existence of many medical problems among the ancient Saurians, including dental problems, elevated blood pressure, obesity, heart disease, and early mortality. Clearly, the diet of the ancient Saurians was responsible for these problems. The high incidence of high blood pressure, obesity, and heart disease in Sauria today even among those who have tried low-fat, high-carbohydrate diets further proves that Sauria's leading nutritional experts are wrong."[/size]{ vPp H(`
[size=4][/size] ;A2L3q9W1B2C
[size=4]字数:408[/size]+C q S&kW
[size=4][/size]
dRX7k;FA [size=4]8月中旬作文,已经练了8篇A,这是第9篇,还没有计时间,这样的文章大致能的多少分,结构上怎样改进[/size]NY!q6[2A r3Q$C,s
[size=4][/size] A5BM(xn
[size=4]第一段:给出作者观点及相关论据[/size]
j/EDaVUFz _ [size=4][/size]
A#s)GrK?/g [size=4]第二段:由于Sauria木乃伊代表的是统治阶层,不能代表大多数人的情况。[/size]E4cpH2Df ^%jMk
[size=4][/size]
3zJqh#E&y [size=4]第三段:现在那些有高脂肪,低碳水化合物饮食习惯的Sauria人,可能会有更严重的疾病。[/size]IXU]+Zy6a-t1Y9s*A
[size=4][/size]
"wDLbxk{ [size=4]第四段:作者忽略了导致疾病的其他因素。[/size]
~'j^;^0B'U/? [size=4][/size] WhF$P&kt5DR iF
[size=4]第五段:说明为了使文章又说服力还应补充哪些内容。[/size]g YFE]zS7n"P T
[size=4][/size] ;E)u.yw$h}Q4LX
[size=4][/size]
V9HA!R$r R*vzSR [font=宋体, MS Song][size=4]In this analysis, the arguer attempts to convince us that dieting habit what Sauria's leading nutritional experts suggest is unscientific, based on which he assumes a evidence about Sauria ancient mummifies with high carbohydrates and low fat dieting habit show the existence of many medical problems, along with a survey toward present people that some kind of disease among those who have tried low-fat, high-carbohydrate diets. As it stands, this argument is virtually unpersuasive in several aspects.[/size][/font]
P G*M^ H)m S3lN [font=宋体, MS Song][size=4] [/size][/font]Ubr%gls
[font=宋体, MS Song][size=4]First of all, diseases of ancient Sauria mummifies remain of Sauria's ruling classes contribute little to justify arguer's attitude that a diet high in complex carbohydrates and low in fat is harmful to good health. For the reason that these mummifies can only delegate some kind of special classes in ancient Sauria who might have sufficient money to embrace whatever life they pursue, also being the ruling stage, they are bound to belong the minority among the whole ancient Sauria people, so the author's claim is convincing only if ancient Sauria's ruling classes could typify all its inhabitants.[/size][/font]4S2t3r M:JFD
[font=宋体, MS Song][size=4] [/size][/font]
dp*t5f!x9_s f [font=宋体, MS Song][size=4]Secondly, the fact that high blood pressure, obesity, and heart disease in Sauria today among those who have low-fat, high-carbohydrate diets is groundless to support arguer's assertion. people with high blood pressure, obesity, and heart disease merely serve as an exist phenomena happened in having low-fat, high-carbohydrate people, yet it is never justify that having that kind of diet habit will surely lead to these kind of diseases. It is entirely possible that people who have tried high-fat, low-carbohydrate diets are more vulnerable to get these diseases.[/size][/font]9F/|Ee'm#D/g1s
[font=宋体, MS Song][size=4] [/size][/font]
@*LF m)pi6\ [font=宋体, MS Song][size=4]Finally, both of the claim mentioned above ignore the other potential factors which could lead to such kind of diseases as well, such as if both ancient Sauria people and present Saurias would like to exercises in their daily life, if their living environment is polluted or not. All these kind of factors will also effect on people' health.[/size][/font]Fw W ~q W
[font=宋体, MS Song][size=4] [/size][/font]u,HR.i%?el
[font=宋体, MS Song][size=4]In sum, obvious logical reasoning errors make this argument cannot be relied on. In order to strengthen its credibility, several further investigations and analysis--if ancient Sauria's ruling classes have the same diet habit with common people, if present Sauria people who have low carbohydrates and high fat have higher rate to get high blood pressure, obesity, and heart disease than people having the contrary way of diet, what is the environment around both ancient and present Sauria people---are needed before further conclusion and ultimate action. Ri0ojdq6jY
[/size][/font]5QO3Iw'U1q9}
[font=宋体, MS Song] [/font]G*W&C(f{
[size=4][/size]
ceJ PdCk [size=4][/size]
X.Rp4tZ [size=4][/size]
1N z!e+Bn"pzA#v1VH [size=4][/size] )WR)n]M-ej1|)U
[size=4][/size]
xn1w'^)v GD [size=4][/size]
#Vl7Gu6cOB*f,T/E [size=4][/size]

pengbinnn 发表于 2008-7-7 22:15

恳请老师指教

[font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]8月26机考 才开始准备 主要是请老师帮我看看 本人基础不是很好 看向哪个方面努力 能争取什么样的分数 感激不尽[/color][/size][/font]
U,~V~U [font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]arg 9  [/color][/size][/font]
XB4u%g._t&B$}![/Q [font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]TOPIC: ARGUMENT9 - The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.
~:\)L$LYF@dg "Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors."
#KP2{%q'O.f$V [/color][/size][/font]+em0e'q%htU)fn0I
[font=宋体][font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]提纲[/color][/size][/font][/font]
;VE|Q9~ZdEnj [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]1[font=宋体]论断说明评论工程使得老师对学生的分数虚夸,是非常不公平的,从一定程度上来讲,评论工程可能从一定程度上使得老师虚夸学生的分数,但是武断的认为评论工程就是分数虚夸使得学生工作不好找这是不对的。[/font][/size][/font][/color]+Gy)?P nk ]
[color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]
&djZ6z~2WY [/size][/font][/color]
zMaq.@7Ql3m [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]2 [font=宋体]论断证据不足,论断没有提供任何证据证明评论工程对学生分数虚夸的影响,同时也没说明比较学校的情况,根本就不能轻易下结论[/font][/size][/font][/color].[5J5e*PR6N
[color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]M+gf8n#r?
[/size][/font][/color]
+u QI/ns [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]3 [font=宋体]论断认为这么做学生就能找到好工作,这是不正确的,找工作是多种因素的集合,而不仅仅是分数[/font][/size][/font][/color]
^7U4x1^ uZ5k [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5] We7OD+@C O
[/size][/font][/color]
7ux"kL ~N2q8n#s,G [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]4 [font=宋体]总结[/font][/size][/font][/color]p0r6v0Z3? B;K9n4?
[font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]The argument may present with reason to a certain extent, but not thoroughly well-reasoned. I can not disaffirm the project which evaluates the teaching effectiveness of all the professors at Omega University is the reason that lead to the professors to assign higher grades in their class. By making a comparison of Omega University, with lower employment rate than Alpha University, The project seems a reason that lead to the result is logical.[/color][/size][/font]
T7sK#v X/W [font=Times New Roman][size=5][/size][/font] ucrE(_aHm v
[font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]However, it did not well-demonstrated the reason that the students from Omega university have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University is just the evaluating project. First of all, there aren’t any data illuminate that the evaluating project cause higher grade and then lead to the bad result. On one side, no data can explain that the project is the only reason for higher grade; it is possible that the student may really improve in their study or work harder than before. On the other side, the argument never introduce the information of Alpha University, It appears reasonable, therefore, for the people only focus on the grade now and before at Omega University, not on Alpha University. As a result, we don’t know the grade at Alpha University, so how can we make comparison between them. Moreover, we also don’t know that whether the same evaluating project actualized at Alpha University, so we consider that the evaluating project is the causing to higher grade is dogmatically.[/color][/size][/font]
O'd!vUbU6`z [font=Times New Roman][size=5][/size][/font]
d'Ec j^'a;] z(Z [color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5]
PLVC._ Finding a job, even a good job is not only determined by the grade which the students get in the university, complex factors affect the result for a application for a job, such as experience, expression ability, majors, opportunities, employment situations, economy development level and so on. High grade can not reflect someone’s diathesis comprehensively[font=宋体],[/font]although it can illuminate someone’s ability to a certain extent. According to the argument, President Bush may never find a good job because of his bad grade that he got in the university. Working is not simple but need comprehensive capability. Take salesman as an example, it need you to introduce you production to the customer that you can not easily to deal with, first of all, you must be a man with good mood, smile on face, no one concern that whether you once got high grade at a university. Second, you must well-understand your productions, which contain capability, function, characteristics, price, and any other information about the productions that customers want to know. Third, every excellent salesman must be a professor in communication, well-communication with customers can do a great help to sale the productions. So the grade is not the key factor for the students to find a job, they need other abilities to attract the employer. The argument conclude that the grade fall short of fact makes the students from Omega university can not secure a good job as Alpha university is not logical.[/size][/font][/color]$X7] Rwf%^v
[color=black][font=Times New Roman][size=5])e;kg&q g;v
[/size][/font][/color]
KIp7\!`N1X"{,U [font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black]Overall, the reasoning behind Omega University should terminate student evaluation of professors seems logical as presented above since the supervisor of university considering their students’ future after graduation. However, before any final decision are made about the termination in student evaluation of professors should evaluate all possible alternatives and causes for Omega graduates have not been finding jobs as good as Alpha graduates.[/color][/size][/font]"c\UJ @2f.hhf&G
[font=Times New Roman][size=5][color=black][/color][/size][/font]

zhanglistar 发表于 2008-7-8 11:00

回复 1# tesolchina 的帖子

怎么大家都不写ARGUE吗?

ahs_iat 发表于 2008-7-8 13:39

[size=4]考试时间: 8.1[/size]
xDM KI-P [size=4][color=blue]备考情况[/color]:刚开始,一个人在准备,希望老师能帮忙改下。特别是语言方面(是否很chinglish?),逻辑方面(攻击力度够否?)[/size]
Ve!s5zu0Bg-Ky
L;Ed ^!]9Hc;_ [font=Times New Roman][size=4]TOPIC: [color=red]ARGUMENT9[/color] - The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.[/size][/font]
W(zUC&d/_;s1C [font=Times New Roman][size=4] [/size][/font] A I` VZY0E/}nh
[font=Times New Roman][size=4]"Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors."[/size][/font]
~I.pBw9K*Hb;sMH [font=Times New Roman][size=4]WORDS: 319-_,wK,A#k K6k [G
TIME: 00:30:00G6z.J'^0O
y*Xk1W*Hf
DATE: 2008-7-8 13:00:42[/size][/font]
"_(s'r ]7g1t7`] [font=Times New Roman][size=4] [/size][/font]
$@:eW6?9o MS f [font=Times New Roman][size=4]In the memorandum, the dean suggests that Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors, for the reason that since the evaluating teaching effectiveness measure started, students have gotten higher grades. Moreover, potential employers believe that the grades at Omega University are inflated, which explains the reason why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from Alpha University. At first glance, the suggestion by the dean seems reasonable. However, it is groundless in many aspects.[/size][/font]
E8a*ed\.Gy8| [font=Times New Roman][size=4][/size][/font]
/e0R(@Qr(X$O5A [size=4][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]//[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]将事情发生的先后关系误认为是因果关系[/font][/color][color=blue][/color][/size]
b B}._ z/B2m:Q2w"k8\ [font=Times New Roman][size=4][b]To begin with, the dean commits a fallacy of "Post hoc, ergo propter rum."[/b] That is to say, although it was after Omega University started to encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors that the students' grades have been higher than ever before, it is not exactly not the only and vital reason for the high scores. Perhaps Omega University have been supported by the government to improve its teaching qualities, such as inviting more popular professors, appealing more promising students to study in Omega University. Or perhaps the students have been studying harder and the tests have been easier than before. Without eliminating all these possibilities, the dean could not draw any conclusion based on the fact.[/size][/font]
IQe!J`+B H [font=Times New Roman][size=4]
L3z H W9C:Og [/size][/font]
oLI#o` [size=4][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]//[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]将雇主认为学生成绩被夸大了,但这不是导致找工作失败的唯一原因[/font][/color][color=blue][/color][/size]
tBTb2]I [font=Times New Roman][size=4][b]Moreover, even if the grades do are inflated, there are no reasons to explain why students of Alpha University have been successful in getting jobs while those of Omega University not.[/b] Common sense tells us that there are many factors leading to failures of job hunting. [u]Not only would the inflated grades influence the potential employer's decision, but also whether students meet the job they applied.[/u] Without surveying clearly the casuals of the students' failing in getting jobs, the dean cannot convince us that the inflated grades are the only reason.[/size][/font]~e h"Y ^hG
[font=Times New Roman][size=4]
-v!fI'W-ekh [/size][/font] ;w%llgy6P:H d
[size=4][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]//[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]将[/font][/color][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]A[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]跟[/font][/color][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]O[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]大学做比较,可是[/font][/color][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]A[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]有可能也采用了跟[/font][/color][color=blue][font=Times New Roman]O[/font][/color][color=blue][font=宋体]一样的措施[/font][/color][color=blue][/color][/size]
|] ^Ri/{g [font=Times New Roman][size=4][b]Finally, the dean fails to inform us whether the Alpha University encourages students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all professors.[/b] It is entirely possible that the Alpha University have also utilized the same measurement as the Omega University did. //For that matter, maybe the students in Alpha University got higher grades than those in Omega University. Thus, the dean wrongly assumes that “all things are equal”. That is, the measurement be used by Omega University would not necessarily be used by the Alpha University.[/size][/font]
N\!F0` bmW [font=Times New Roman][size=4] [/size][/font]
&R;H0t1~S [font=Times New Roman][size=4]In sum, the dean renders no reasons for his recommendation. To better support the argument, the dean should give the reasons for the rising grades of students. Besides, the dean should carefully study why students are not successful in getting jobs. Finally, we need to know whether it is reasonable to compare Omega and Alpha University.[/size][/font]
JG&RS].V [size=4][/size]

hotzd001 发表于 2008-7-8 14:23

08-7-28 8:00am%m0l1z;fj F+{&g@
刚刚开始准备,好紧张啊~LZpf9S
$JbX/Hd J-xL
TOPIC: ARGUMENT 150 - The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine. cyaq_/Sf

,tx4v usN?w "The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my conclusion. In 1915 there were seven species of amphibians in the park, and there were abundant numbers of each species. However, in 1992 there were only four species of amphibians observed in the park, and the numbers of each species were drastically reduced. The decline in Yosemite has been blamed on the introduction of trout into the park's waters, which began in 1920 (trout are known to eat amphibian eggs). But the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline because it does not explain the worldwide decline."%Cq$W,uq
WORDS: 297          TIME: 1:02:15          DATE: 2008-7-7
$G c j"W9@:s)l g+?1{(EGXa2B
1.数据统计是否严格,标准是否一致
Na}7z:jq3mc 2.两栖动物的减少是否是全球范围的,加州Y公园是否能代表全球的情况
B ^caKV 3.两栖动物减少与污染是否有必然联系
}Q r!U6fg1[.[ S "j&r8\5X0A#m4VY)b
The letter argues that water and air is polluted globally. To support the argument, the letter cited a study of amphibians' decline in species number and in number of each species in Yosemite Park in California. However in my view, this letter is logically flawed in several respects.
(m*hX va0z(@'t9u'l
K`)}:Y/ERf First of all,  the study in 1992 cannot fully convince me that the species of amphibians were decreased because it statistics might be caused by uncompleted investigation. And we have no idea whether the two surveys were in the same method. The letter said nothing about all these important details. I q3zq]g:e"b&wRt
#is NYFc
Moreover, even if the study and the statistics are convincible, we cannot see any evidence in the letter showing that the decline of amphibians is world wide. It is suspicious that the conditions in California can represent the situation all over the world. Maybe amphibians' number increased in other parts of the world while decreased in Yosemite Park.
x.g1H#z4_ oF } y8a'I_7m2s"T,j
Finally, even if all the conditions above are tenable, that is to say the number of amphibians was declining worldwide, the letter offered no evidence that the decline had anything to do with the global pollution, not to mention in water and air. It is entirely possible that amphibian number's declining is because they were in their natural cycle of low number, or other possible reason while the water and the air are just the same as before. The letter did not exclude all those possibilities but to take pollution for granted.
&w9]y)Y/ATi1uZ/z l*^x`(Jn
In conclusion we cannot see the pollution is happening only according to the letter's evidences and proof. To confirm the pollution in water and air , the letter had better inform some direct facts and numbers of the water and air's conditions now and the criteria about what’s considered as polluted.

hotzd001 发表于 2008-7-8 14:25

[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]c:yII u9N"o
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]08-7-28 8:00am[/font][/size]
5B0vH e9mZ$^1P [font=宋体][size=14pt]刚刚开始准备,好紧张啊[/size][/font][size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]~[/font][/size]+~qau M vr;@ G
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]TOPIC: ARGUMENT 150 - The following is a letter to the editor of an environmental magazine. [/font][/size]
"{&CL.kKS [size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]&s(A3ZO[;AF?f
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]"The decline in the numbers of amphibians worldwide clearly indicates the global pollution of water and air. Two studies of amphibians in Yosemite National Park in California confirm my conclusion. In 1915 there were seven species of amphibians in the park, and there were abundant numbers of each species. However, in 1992 there were only four species of amphibians observed in the park, and the numbers of each species were drastically reduced. The decline in Yosemite has been blamed on the introduction of trout into the park's waters, which began in 1920 (trout are known to eat amphibian eggs). But the introduction of trout cannot be the real reason for the Yosemite decline because it does not explain the worldwide decline."[/font][/size]
V4eO2qeH/Gj(X [size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]WORDS: 297(}D7pWn5[] L/y
TIME: 1:02:15
/w%\%H H l7QRD DATE: 2008-7-7[/font][/size]([%fL8Pn!s"t
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]
3Q0u!^ u0N!O [size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size] ]*Uf0H5i!yx r
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]The letter argues that water and air is polluted globally. To support the argument, the letter cited a study of amphibians' decline in species number and in number of each species in Yosemite Park in California. However in my view, this letter is logically flawed in several respects.[/font][/size]MrOO%q'B
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]
Eqq)j+U&G [size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]First of all,Jt4c#[-k e)`
the study in 1992 cannot fully convince me that the species of amphibians were decreased because it statistics might be caused by uncompleted investigation. And we have no idea whether the two surveys were in the same method. The letter said nothing about all these important details. [/font][/size]0~^-f/M:|7r fu
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size] c z-u ^ |a
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]Moreover, even if the study and the statistics are convincible, we cannot see any evidence in the letter showing that the decline of amphibians is world wide. It is suspicious that the conditions in California can represent the situation all over the world. Maybe amphibians' number increased in other parts of the world while decreased in Yosemite Park. [/font][/size]l-r&R0V gV.t
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]w7e7M/N1whWa\
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]Finally, even if all the conditions above are tenable, that is to say the number of amphibians was declining worldwide, the letter offered no evidence that the decline had anything to do with the global pollution, not to mention in water and air. It is entirely possible that amphibian number's declining is because they were in their natural cycle of low number, or other possible reason while the water and the air are just the same as before. The letter did not exclude all those possibilities but to take pollution for granted.[/font][/size]9w[@.X;VE!H
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]
fv"qYf+?jb [size=14pt][font=Times New Roman]In conclusion we cannot see the pollution is happening only according to the letter's evidences and proof. To confirm the pollution in water and air , the letter had better inform some direct facts and numbers of the water and air's conditions now and the criteria about what’s considered as polluted.[/font][/size]Ge1G`"c)r v
[size=14pt][font=Times New Roman] [/font][/size]

wangwuyi 发表于 2008-7-8 16:50

大好人呀~~

tongzhi 发表于 2008-7-8 20:18

8.11AW
5b#MLr']D Kr N+p\ D Z q5_V8}9~
想知道这水平大概几分,谢谢老师!R{.XQ}3q"MSb9^

7ns TES Ho TOPIC: ARGUMENT36 - The following appeared in an article written by Dr. Karp, an anthropologist.
m'\9IHC"SM5YK 3RP {"sZV,s)e
"Twenty years ago Dr. Field, a noted anthropologist, visited the island of Tertia and concluded from his observations that children in Tertia were reared by an entire village rather than by their own biological parents. However, my recent interviews with children living in the group of islands that includes Tertia show that these children spend much more time talking about their biological parents than about other adults in the village. This research proves that Dr. Field's conclusion about Tertian village culture is false, and thus that the observation-centered approach to studying cultures is invalid. Because they are using the interview-centered method, my team of graduate students working in Tertia will establish a much more accurate understanding of child-rearing traditions there and in other island cultures."6F s2j9A]
WORDS: 505          TIME: 01:00:00          DATE: 2008-7-6 11:14:50V Tf~ }N

re C NKA%qw-h 逻辑漏洞:
M,|+?G nu;s 1. 无效研究及相识性假设: Dr. Karp的方法不一定是对的,教授没有提供有多少孩子参加调查,以及有多少是有效的. 教授假设他和Dr. Filed的情况是完全一致的, 有可能Dr. Karp才进行调查,所以这调查不能代表一直以来的趋势. 或者Dr. Filed进行研究是在很多年前,那时候岛上的情况就是那样,随着时间发生了变化.
3L6G"Wb)Sl{;qVAT b~B"KD2k
2. Dr. Karp认为他的方法 (interview) 是正确的, 而Dr. Filed的方法(observation)是错误的. 但有可能两者的方法是错误的,interview的调查对象可能被误导,也有可能为了给别人好的印象而误答问题. 而且还有其他方法进行研究,比如调查.
J'[(^Wu iB)a|
;Y8x~'PE;c dER 3. Dr. Karp认为他的研究生就一定运用他的方法,很有可能学生为了运用自己的知识,而采取其他方法,那么这些研究结果就和interview方法没关.
3}'?)J0` t9_OH 7{5FzgT;r
In this article, Dr. Karp claims that the conclusion of Dr. Field that children in Tertia were reared by whole village rather than their own parents is false. Because this conclusion runs contrary to Dr. Karp research on this situation and, more importantly, Dr. Field apply observation-centered way to study. Then Dr. Karp concludes that their groups get more accurate result due to use the interview-centered method. This argument bases on a series of unsubstantial assumptions and thus is unpersuasive.
Oyr_2`oz4A+B:cO:@
WC'qZUo To begin with, the threshold assumption upon which the writer depends on his/her study is true. The professor said that his conclusion result from interviews, but unfortunately he never told us how many children did this interview and how many children did the interview but did not give all responses. These are vital to the validity of interview. And he did not offer the time of interview and of the Dr. Field’s observation. Dr. Karp thinks that situation which he and Dr. Field confronted was similar. As we know, if he did the interview very recent, the outcome could not present the entirely trend of children, it only presented nowadays. And if Dr. Field did observation in a long time, Dr. Field might got the genuine situation, and this trend changed as time pass. So, in face with no evidence, Dr. Karp cannot make any conclusion at all.;@4DT G| E(\5]

pivco)f In addition, the arguer rests on additional assumption that his way is effective and Dr. Field's way is false. He just given the name of ways did not told about how to operate them. So, people cannot judge which way is effective and true. Perhaps, both of them are invalid, and it is entirely possible that there is another way can conduct this research and get most accurate outcome. Consider, professor can conduct a survey about this matter; they can let all children in this island to do this survey, as a result, get true scientific findings. And as we know that interview-centered method has some demerits, the people who are studied could be leaded the answer by researcher and also could wrongly echo the question due to they want to make a good impression to researcher. Thus, without ruling out these explanations, Dr. Karp cannot draw the conclusion that his scientific way is valid. /u HJ/i y qZit&d
,`[&G5Z:X(w.Y}'r
Furthermore, the professor assumes that his team of graduate students implemented interview-centered approach. However, this important evidence was not provided by professor. If graduate students utilized another way to study this problem, then any scientific conclusion cannot relate to interview-centered approach. It is wholly possible that students wanted to test their knowledge which learned in class, so they applied a new method to solve this difficulty. In short, without offering enough evidence and taking other possibilities into consideration, the writer cannot draw such firm conclusion.
&HB'AG N#D@}kY
b z C Gk)^/| bHA` To sum up, in order to persuade people to believe writer’s assumption, the professor should provide enough evidence about the validity of study, and the demerit of Dr. Field's way. And he also should offer the situation which he and Dr. Field confront is entirely similar and the method of ensuring students implemented this approach.

meds 发表于 2008-7-8 22:35

[font=Tahoma][size=4][color=royalblue][color=seagreen][color=darkgreen]考试时间: 7-23(DQ o h(s-CoE!W%B
备考情况: 6月中旬开始,主要看的网上的介绍和方法,题库看了部分,还没看完,每个题感觉要看很久.....现在边看题,边积累句子中~
V"E0o(N/o/XZ3[$b 抄题:
W0Cw&x5K0LwX |'a5[ TOPIC: ARGUMENT137 - The following appeared in an editorial in the Mason City newspaper. i*Bf)w1d"O~d
r dy-~y,S
"At present, Mason City residents seldom use the nearby Mason River for any kind of recreational activity, even though surveys of the region's residents consistently rank water sports (swimming, fishing, and boating) as a favorite form of recreation. Since there have been complaints about the quality of the water in the river, residents must be avoiding the river because they think that it is not clean enough. But that situation is about to change: the agency responsible for rivers in our region has announced plans to clean up Mason River. Therefore, recreational use of the river is likely to increase, so the Mason City council will need to increase its budget for improvements to the publicly owned lands along the Mason River."6}-?`]k3N
列大纲: F D$xH+v@;V
1. 简述及评价作者观点,指出其存在谬误。
U,g1q/d2z5_jot5P+s 2. 攻击前提,水质好了就有人来水上活动 Y#p D(UMFKQY)[_
3. 攻击例子,没证据证明水会恢复原来的质量-C{.j4Q E;|{q
4. 攻击结论,在决定建设河岸之前,要考虑各个相关方面
j+Y0jxc 5. 总结,作者建议不当,须做进一步工作。8QI+_hV;V&f

%m/K i#o*[$Z!` 正文:[/color]
rxo't*w9Bd t [/color]WORDS: 387          TIME: 00:33:00          DATE: 2008-7-7 19:44:18
P5u&d!fu)? "~5|1aTamj;`ts6Rj
The arguer claims that the Mason City council need to support the improvements to the publicly owned lands along the Mason River, because the agency responsible for rivers promises to clean up the Mason River. In addition, the arguer points out most of the citizens in Mason City prefer to the recreation of water sports. The suggestion seems sound and convincing at first glance, but several critical flaws undermine the validity of this argument as analyzed below.
;e;J[k tKN ]*YY Jyc y2F"s
Firstly, the arguer makes his suggestion on the base that the citizens are willing to do exercises on the river if the Mason River is cleared again. But no information is offered by the author about that the residents would like to choose Mason River for their recreations place. It is possible that the residents have set up a regulation to the nearby swimming pools and prefer the surroundings and service there to the wild river, even if the river is clear than before. And they may think the swimming pools are always cleaner and safer than a river.
f6r&~*m.@o%lUh3A8}1Q
5FZMwS N Secondly, the arguer fail to provide sufficient evidence to prove that the river can be cleaned by the agency, and the water quality can be extremely improved to fit the standards for swimming and boating. In a common sense, the polluted river needs a long period to recover and reset the environment nearby the river. So maybe in these years, the water quality can not improved to a good condition as the people expected, so to enhance the circumstance around the river have no persuasion in requiring a additional budget.
~ p yl;u5IU*d\
*`S7m#O4qZ Thirdly, the arguer draws a hasty generalization to make his suggestion. More considerations are called for before his suggestion of improving the publicly owned lands along the Mason River. How does the river along sides' condition? How much money is needed and how long will this improvement program is taken? Too many facts are required before the final decision. Maybe the river is too far from the center of the city, even if the condition is improved, there is still no one will come for exercising.
&UP%R+y]-u .?%\Q5V V @
In sum, the author’s suggestion has no persuasion, and more information is needed to prove that the improvement of the river sides can provide a good environment for the residents to do water sports.
+W"_D k`
D*j&T(p.I [color=darkgreen]谢谢老师,希望多提意见,以及今后应怎样提高。[/color][/color][/size][/font]w/}kfT8J;p5K!k8v
B&[3t3p3o4N
[[i] 本帖最后由 meds 于 2008-7-8 22:38 编辑 [/i]]

zhanglistar 发表于 2008-7-8 22:45

回复 4# zhanglistar 的帖子

谢谢老师 EpK3H YeT
写argue还不熟悉如何进行 1?cE&q@ W2XW8B
希望在课程上能够学到些

贝加莫的野孩子 发表于 2008-7-8 23:04

[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]考试时间:离考试还有12天[/size][/size][/font]3Y"k_._w
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
.}Qq4Ky7_ CX3P [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]备考情况:按太傻上下载的一个argu分类,将每个题目的提纲都列了一遍,从不限时,到目前限制28分钟作文,一共写了20多篇argument[/size][/size][/font]
/eg`6`2~ [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]目前的疑问有主要逻辑错误找出,而遗漏一些次要不明显的错误是否影响成绩。五段论是否太过套路化;希望您从以下几个方面指点下我的文章:文章模版化痕迹过重吗?语言表达准确吗?行文思路是否清晰(即攻击的错误点主次是否合理,先后是否合理)?非常感谢![/size][/size][/font]7D AQj-Q;TgO6i-^
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]$y/htK O`
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]抄题:[/size][/size][/font]sS*m`8q0a(} E k g:J?
[size=4][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]1[/size][/font][font=宋体][size=10.5pt].[/size][/font][/size]^] H&G^cC
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]TOPIC: ARGUMENT65 - The following appeared in a memo from the president of a chain of cheese stores located throughout the United States.[/size][/size][/font]a:F[/W9wa*?0_
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
mNp I7SZ5nZ [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]"For many years all the stores in our chain have stocked a wide variety of both domestic and imported cheeses. Last year, however, the five best-selling cheeses at our newest store were all domestic cheddar cheeses from Wisconsin. Furthermore, a recent survey by Cheeses of the World magazine indicates an increasing preference for domestic cheeses among its subscribers. Since our company can reduce expenses by limiting inventory, the best way to improve profits in all of our stores is to discontinue stocking many of our varieties of imported cheese and concentrate primarily on domestic cheeses."[/size][/size][/font]
"z st;DU-zwI [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]oh*F'Kv g2H
[size=4][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]2[/size][/font][font=宋体][size=10.5pt].[/size][/font][/size]
su(Yo!G'i,L%? [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]TOPIC: ARGUMENT238 - The following appeared in a memorandum from the president of Mira Vista College to the college's board of trustees.[/size][/size][/font];Q2T(g}4O
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
/}`Bq-]6v3V [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]"At nearby Green Mountain College, which has more business courses and more job counselors than does Mira Vista College, 90 percent of last year's graduating seniors had job offers from prospective employers. But at Mira Vista College last year, only 70 percent of the seniors who informed the placement office that they would be seeking employment had found full-time jobs within three months after graduation, and only half of these graduates were employed in their major field of study. To help Mira Vista's graduates find employment, we must offer more courses in business and computer technology and hire additional job counselors to help students with their resumés and interviewing skills." [/size][/size][/font]s4CW,Q:K)V k2r
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
L(~K8C m5Z [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4][/size][/size][/font] `1J*x)ap^XG q
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4][/size][/size][/font]
m;| OFp k [size=4][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]ARGUMENT65[/size][/font][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]:[/size][/font][/size]9{+vt4Wi
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第一段:引用题目依据,过渡到攻击段落[/size][/size][/font]
L F`;^^rJ [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第二段:攻击一家店的情况不代表国产奶酪在全国连锁商店里都受欢迎;以及一年的情况不足以推测过去以及将来的奶酪购买倾向。[/size][/size][/font]5P1OW+cBN0Q)S rH@
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第三段:攻击杂志调查的权威性,以及可靠性(主要攻击样本数量不足和调查的对象未必有代表性,比如受调查的男性可能平时都不去买奶酪)[/size][/size][/font]
R ])g1Edq [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第四段:攻击作者忽略了减少进口奶酪可能带来的负面影响以及忽略了其他可能影响利润以及开销的因素。[/size][/size][/font]}x(tHHj
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第五段:总结[/size][/size][/font]cgij#\
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
6^uGsj^B+b/DP [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]习文:[/size][/size][/font]FEL&\/uCo:U+g!O
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]In this argument, the author cites the last year's selling report at their newest store and a survey conducted by the Cheeses of the World magazine among its subscribers to illustrate the conclusion that domestic cheeses are much more needed than imported one and thus make the recommendation that their company should reduce the store of imported cheese. Though the evidence presented by the author seems to be reasonable, I find several logical flaws in it by close scrutinizing it.[/size][/size][/font]
-MA~1m*j!J;| _ [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
AWB yY,o [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]To begin with, the author failed to provide enough statistical figures to prove that the best-selling cheeses in their chain stores are domestic cheeses. The only selling report from a new store can not be representative of all the selling conditions in other stores. Because people in different places may be favored with different flavor of cheeses, cheeses from Wisconsin were sold well in one store might be a coincidence that people there like them. In addition, a year's report can not be used to predict the future market. Since the author has not provided a study to show that customers who bought domestic cheeses last year are satisfactory with them and will continue to buy them in the next year, I can not accept the author's conclusion.[/size][/size][/font]p{+epH(Y!c
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
j*u ygaf)q#m [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]Furthermore, the author is failing to guarantee the efficacy of the study that he cited from the Cheeses of the World magazine. For example, the magazine may have only a small number of subscribers which means there were few people attended the study. If this is the case, it is entirely possible that these participants just occupied the small proportion of customers who favor the domestic cheeses in United States or they just scarcely buy cheeses themselves(For instance, most the participants are men who seldom go to shopping themselves).Without more detailed figures to ensure the authority of this study, the author could not rely on it to draw any persuasive conclusion.[/size][/size][/font]
c3j3E0S)x/^c [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]\S? S*^n [&l
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]Finally, the author neglected other factors that might the profits and expenses of their company and has made a hasty recommendation. On the one hand, the future market are not carefully predict by the author, whether reducing stocking of imported cheese may bring about scant selling condition is still unknown. On the other hand, opinions of customers are not considered by the author to make such a recommendation. If the chain stores are just popular among the Americans because of the varieties of products, reducing the sorts of cheeses is surely to harm the potential customers. Besides, the author has not compared the profits brought by domestic cheeses with imported ones, it is subjective to claim that it is more beneficial to stock more domestic cheeses while reducing the imported ones.[/size][/size][/font]!A saE"\+Dm
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font] TiiFYG'v.QDP
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]To sum up, the author can not justify his conclusion on the basis of scant evidence provided in this argument. To strength it the author must adduce other reliable evidence that could be used to predict the future market and ensure the profits of the whole company.[/size][/size][/font]He.Mg%O4u4c
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]P9|a7Nc
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]———————————————————————————————————————[/size][/size][/font]QT"ls\
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
3kJud![jV5d [size=4][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]ARGUMENT238[/size][/font][font=宋体][size=10.5pt]:[/size][/font][/size]} w yh@
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第一段:引用题目依据,过渡到攻击段落[/size][/size][/font]
5U*o(T+d ~2U_,m^^ [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第二段:攻击一年的就业情况不能说明商业领域人才的需要会一直很大;其次G校的学生工作就业情况可能一直很好,而非更改的课程提供了更多的就业机会,即体现不出增加商业课程和提供就业指导的好处。[/size][/size][/font]w4pTVvHY2_
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第三段:攻击作者忽略了影响就业情况的其他因素,并提出几种可能性[/size][/size][/font]
4XJTUJ%D [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第四段:攻击作者提供的依据不足以说明电脑技术和商业课程是市场最需要的,以及学生面试技巧和课程安排给他们成功就业造成障碍。[/size][/size][/font]I,aF:j TV_*sH
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]第五段:总结[/size][/size][/font];] j{sS/|
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
[Md:q| I HH.u [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]习文:[/size][/size][/font]
6^:gPFP$Y c [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]In this argument, the author cited relative figures from Green Mountain College(GMC) and Mira Vista College(MVC) to illustrate the conclusion that more business courses and more job counselors are really needed to help the seniors find ideal jobs in MVC. Though the reasons presented by the author seems to be reasonable, I find several logical flaws in it by close scrutinizing it.[/size][/size][/font]#l)e%jU {]Y_F
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
&bU4L'Xc^_@I1U*t [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]To begin with, the only figures drawn from last year can not indicate that more business courses and more job counselors are always helpful. It is possible that more businessmen are only needed during last year's market which won't mean there will still be big need for businessmen in local place. Besides, the author failed to show that the proportion of hired graduates in GMC is significantly increased last year compared with other years. Maybe students graduating from GMC are always easy to find job because of the school's high quality of teaching and reputation. Therefore, without more detailed figure of the hired graduates in different years, the author's conclusion is unreliable.[/size][/size][/font]C.x'}E)dt){"iY@
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
fi]B&W1B1O [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]In addition, the author is failing to rule out other factors that may lead to the different hiring rate between these tow schools. For example, it is fully possible that more graduates from MVC are more willing to start their only business than to work for bosses. Or many of them are not compelled to find a work right away after their graduation. If this is the case, the figure merely based on a period of three months will not serve the author's goal at all.[/size][/size][/font]
6u M7J,b?9p_z [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]
*p`W$d7KV [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]Furthermore, the fact that only half of graduates in MVC were employed in their major field of study can not build up the author's conclusion. Because the works provided by the society are always changing during years, which means not many graduates can surely find jobs that fit their majors. In other conditions, the graduates might just want to change a field from their major or they found themselves uninteresting in the major they studied in school. So the author can not use such fact to claim that the structure of MVC's curriculums are improper.[/size][/size][/font]
(f'n,X-r0eb [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]IZ!?J R0k2{
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]Finally, the author failed to provide sufficient evidence to indicate that business and computer technology are most needed in the future and the interviewing skills and resumes are the most scant abilities for the graduates to find a satisfactory job. No convincing study or statistical figures can attest this is the case. Therefore, the author's recommendation turns out to be unbelievable.[/size][/size][/font]
;|8NAI EH3q'F{P [font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4] [/size][/size][/font]/vB6\V6|
[font=宋体][size=10.5pt][size=4]To sum up, the author can not guarantee that efficacy of these figures that he quoted and failed to provide more details that would contribute to his claims. To better assess this argument, the author should present figures of other years and other evidence that can prove that business and computer technology are most required in the future.[/size][/size][/font]3zR*H`?ell
[size=4][/size]

ahs_iat 发表于 2008-7-9 12:35

为什么都没有改的?

Shinyshan 发表于 2008-7-9 12:39

"The population of Balmer Island increases to 100,000 duing the summer months. To reduce the number of accidents involving mopeds and pedestrians, the town council of Balmer Island should limit the number of mopeds rented by each of the island's six moped and bicycle rental companies from 50 per day to 30 per day during the summer season. By limiting the number of rentals, the town council is sure to attain the 50 percent reduction in moped accidents that was achieved last year in the neighboring island of Torseau, when Torseau's town council enforced similar limits on moped rentals."bN&G \Nt
WORDS: 525          TIME: 00:29:24          DATE: 2008-7-8 23:14:05
6h"awA.HvX d0v 8v A9f0\ n-b:h*GJn3y
The arguer suggests that the town council of Balmer Island should limit the number of mopeds rented by each of the island's six moped and bicycle rental companies. To support this conclusion, the arguer points out that last year in the neighboring island of Torseau enforced similar limits and attained this goal. What is more, the arguer mentions a increasing number of the population. However, close scrutiny of evidence reveals that the argument suffers from several flaws, rendering the argument unconvincing as it stands. I%Oe1{? b D r
1人口增长与事故数量增长以及结论没有必然关系+SRtt]/b
The threshold problem with the argument is that the arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between the increase of population and the increase of number of accidents. It seems to suggest that, the growing number of people contribute to the number of mopeds and pedestrians used and the number of accidents. The arguer provides no evidence to rule of the possibility that the total number of mopeds and pedestrians rented did not change. It is entirely possible that people there does not prefer mopeds and pedestrians as tool of transportation. Nor does the arguer provide that the correlation is actually the causal relationship. Perhaps other factors also affect the number of accidents in summer, such as the bad weather. Thus, there is possibly no relationship between the growing number of people with the use of mopeds and pedestrians._] g#PH:r(c%`_:d,`
2事故一定是因为租mp引起
JCI+Zm*|7O5hv-{3l The second problem is that the arguer provides scant evidence to prove that there is a relationship between the number of accidents and the number of rented mopeds and pedestrians. It is also possible that people in Balmer Island prefer to purchase their own mopeds and pedestrians, while they do not rent them. Or perhaps the number of mopeds and pedestrians rented are old and need only a check. Or perhaps the total of accident is small and people are not severely injured, while at the same time other sorts of accidents are also high. Without ruling out the possibilities that other factors contribute to the number of accidents, the arguer's conclusion is unjustified.
s hdM:]S(n 3两个城不可比
#p0MU3YDX"C'[| The last problem worth considering is that the arguer commits a fallacy of false analogy, because no evidence was provided that the two cities are actually comparable. It is, for example, that the decrease number of accidents in Torseau has nothing to do with the limit. Rather, it was due to the good condition of traffic or a decreasing number of cars. Or perhaps people rent mopeds and pedestrians became aware of their safety. Neither evidence was showed to prove that the policies will have a positive effect. Perhaps the amount of mopeds and pedestrians will be insufficient and it causes trouble in residents’ every day life. What is more, the arguer should also provide evidence to support the rented number of 30 per day is adequate.+`9?)Q&} T

Y'A \xj$F To sum up, the argument is problematic as discussed above. To better support the argument, the arguer has to provide more evidence about the causal relationship between the increasing number of accidents, as well as the population, and the number of rented mopeds and pedestrians. To better assess the argument I would also need to know the feasibility of the policy.

pkusummer 发表于 2008-7-9 16:45

回复 1# tesolchina 的帖子

老师能帮我改一下吗?
m%X)H:t$y+s\ 我7月23号机考,北京。才准备没几天……)cy:r&Qv9`r

lX0Wr%v5Uj 对本篇练习的个人评价:j9fv z5^n
打字太慢,各段结尾句都来不及写。,s&n,^ID m@'t
理由貌似不是很中肯。!QB4Z{3~@;I$j
句子还比较简单。IWCP.hY2m
)N0jL,Ur-B+E;OW
TOPIC: ARGUMENT9 - The following appeared in a memorandum from a dean at Omega University.1o:AUL#_ _'|

YG sdv "Fifteen years ago, Omega University implemented a new procedure that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors. Since that time, Omega professors have begun to assign higher grades in their classes, and overall student grade averages at Omega have risen by thirty percent. Potential employers apparently believe the grades at Omega are inflated; this would explain why Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as have graduates from nearby Alpha University. To enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University should now terminate student evaluation of professors."3k[2uY Fnx3f ? g
&S B4]4x B4j1l
提纲:
r+Y'|7K!`4F\ (1)高分不一定由教学评估引起
3Fs"r#G%U (2)工作不好找不一定由高分引起-V/vefO*o
(3)为确保好工作不一定要停止教学评估
'M&d}3}D'][x7t WORDS: 433          TIME: 0:30:00          DATE: 2008-7-9
#Nt]*]*L,zx8yj
L*q4R1X | In this analysis, the arguer recommends that to enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University (OU) should now terminate evaluation of professors. To justify the recommendation, the arguer points out that since OU implemented a now procedure that that encouraged students to evaluate the teaching effectiveness of all their professors, the professors have begun to assign higher grades and overall student grade averages have risen. In addition, the arguer points out that it is why Omega students have not been as successful at getting jobs as graduates from AU. Critical scrutiny, however, will reveal how groundless the argument is.'th2]$Ut(k)^(J4W
First, the arguer fails to convince us that the fact that the students get higher grades is due to the evaluation of the professors. The arguer simply points out that since the evaluation of professors, the grade average have risen, but he ignores the other possible factors that may lead to the higher grades. For instance, OU may have recruited better teachers so the teaching effect have risen, and students are doing much better than before.#UXu4G4jj}
Second, the arguer cites the phenomenon that Omega graduates have not been as successful at getting jobs as graduates from AU. But it does not follow that it is the higher grades that lead to this. For example, the fact that Omega students are not successful at getting jobs as graduates from AU may be due to that students of OU mainly take majors of languages, history, etc, which is not practical at getting jobs. Without this information, the argument is unconvincing.;H[i ?'vK4RUo
Third, the arguer draws a conclusion that to enable its graduates to secure better jobs, Omega University (OU) should now terminate evaluation of professors, which is certainly not the case. As we know, the evaluation can help encourage the professor to take serious attitudes at their work. Even if we accept the assumption that it is the evaluation that leads to their failure when getting jobs, some other alternative measures can be taken to enable graduates to secure better jobs. For example, OU can set a limit to the highest grade that the professors give and the proportion as well. Or OU can raise the standard of the grades.
\0z$GuftZ'y To sum up, the argument is not as persuasive as it stands. To make it logically accepted, the arguer should provide accurate evidence that it is the evaluation that leads to the higher grades, which make the employers believe that the grades are inflated. To better access the argument, the arguer should also provide other steps that can be taken to enable students of OU to secure better jobs./}7N]o~u:x"Xg
0cVZKcs)s2[ A
请老师狠批啊!谢谢!

Flora_2007 发表于 2008-7-9 23:23

7月23考试
!wl"crk zn 准备也有一个月了,但是由于基础不好,现在写文章严重超时,文章也实在惨不忍睹,还有十三天就考试了,希望老师给出指导。
HL'P$^Na\o;B9G-k!P 字数:501
To1{ q"`&g;@ 提纲:正文
Bk1S%M9A~$w2aT 第一段:由于科技进步我们有更多空闲。B b],[S4Z;a8a:Up
      第二段:但是,大多数情况下,科技进步的主要目标是帮助人们解决社会问题,并且帮助人了解世界
,o#{&e&U.F#D7iBy       第三段:而且,科技进步的同时也引起了不少问题,并不是带给我们空闲时间
/?+QY^P#[+z 30. "The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that everyone has more leisure time."
/|%}WgQ;@q7{ x.[cs9H2fG0x
Should the primary goal of technological advancement be to increase people’s efficiency so that everyone has more leisure time? The speaker asserts so, and I concede that most of time more leisure time of us steams from the increase people’s efficiency though technological advancement. Otherwise, usually, the primary goal of technological development is not that and the technological advancement may breed other effect.
0L9^#m7z,WQg$R1i
G&C| K-G0C(A2M T5d Admittedly, due to our efficiency’s raise with the benefit of technological advancement, we have more and more free time in our daily life. To illustrate it, people should look no further than the houses. The housewife can have a talk with her close friends, with the washing machine washing clothes or the microwave oven cooking her dinner. One hundred years ago, almost no people could envision that nowadays, People could fly from New York to Beijing in twenty hours. The less time spent on travel, the more time people could cost in interesting things. With the help of computers, without working overtime, staff could complete their report forms. Coincident with technological advancement, people’s daily life becomes more efficient.
1`7GQ*Hl M8? G8g
7D|sb9j1Z9? However, we have to admit that generally the primary goal of technological advancement is not only to increase people’s efficiency. For the one hand, it is to solve the pressing problems which people meet in the process of the development of society. The research of hybrid rice is for the sake of relieving starvation the problem should be confronted by many countries, especially, China. The innovation of bacterin is for saving lives when infection comes. AIDS is not a disease, but a grave social problem that affects the improvement of quality of life. For the other hand, it provides people a sense of the universe; for example, the astronomical telescope gives us a chance to know the university and the discovery of DNA help us learn ourselves. All of these could not bring a minute free to us, but they are also the goals of technological advancement.5uk6e\]yBEGaE h

nT zj }&?H/Ym In addition, the increase people’s efficiency cannot bring leisure time, but busyness and pressure. Most of us feel busier than our parents, which lies in the technological advancement. Sometimes, we must talk with others though the phone; meanwhile, we must listen to the financial news and address the stock. It is not rare to see that many people have to work over night, for the reason that, the internet has broken up the limitation between the Eastern Hemisphere and the Western Hemisphere and if not work overtime, people may lose the opportunities from the other hemisphere. Besides, it is true that computers can do many works more quickly and more accurately, but we could not overlook that many people are worried about that computers may pose the unemployment. *Fji Y-p

)ybq{m!~ In final analysis, though in our daily lives, we reap more leisure time derive from technological advancement, most of time, the main goal of the technological advancement is not the one that the speaker asserts and it brings many other problems that we are not expected.

pkusummer 发表于 2008-7-9 23:35

回复 25# Flora_2007 的帖子

请问楼上是ISSUE还是ARGU啊?izjdIu ?p#SK
还有,我在ISSUE和ARGU都没有找到这个题?难道题目编号不一样?你的是哪个版本呢~~

Flora_2007 发表于 2008-7-9 23:37

刚刚失手把issue也发上去了,对不起老师啊,由于两篇文章一样烂请老师给也顺便给看看吧。感激涕零! kVy2P(}c
7月23考试,_'oM"oP;K8~o
准备也有一个月了,但是由于基础不好,现在写文章严重超时,文章也实在惨不忍睹,还有十三天就考试了,希望老师给出指导。
^2rD*p+N;`q 字数:4718Xj*Y o:Y
提纲:第一段:老年人不一定不喜欢摇滚乐
K0d'|Y+O)e       第二段:没有排除其他因素影响音像店中唱片销量下降
!T9kI-M)P y       第三段:错误类比了station KNOW和邻城的广播站,还有做的调查不可靠;h1Q${TH)f.c
235. The following appeared in a memorandum from the general manager of KNOW radio station. 3n.L.io%J2Z0@-_&wh
}ig&aX5BZ(r
"Several factors indicate that radio station KNOW should shift its programming from rock-and-roll music to a continuous news format. Consider, for example, the number of older people in our listening area has increased dramatically, while the total number of our listeners has recently declined. Also, music stores in our area report decreased sales of recorded music. Finally, continuous news stations in neighboring cities have been very successful, and a survey taken just before the recent election shows that local citizens are interested in becoming better informed about politics."
.} \$sv_#Zm`VIZ o0nz2dwW8~P&}

qPVzvm Z Bo In this argument, the arguer concludes that radio station KNOW should shift its programming from rock-and-roll music to a continuous news format. To support this argument, the arguer cites that in the listening area the number of old people has increased but the total number of listeners has declined, the sales of recorded music decreased and continuous news stations in neighboring cities have been successful and the local citizens are interested in politics. The argument suffers from several critical flaws.
(x!h G}Zm f HPo @/M _'h
The major problem in this argument is that the arguer fails to establish causal relationship between the fact that, in the listening area, the number of old people increased and the claim that radio station KNOW should broadcast rock-and-roll music. The arguer fails to provide evidence that old people prefer news than rock-and-roll. Even if the old people like news more than rock-and-roll, but it does not indicate that old people love listening to the radio and they may love watch TV. m D)i-a*U6L V.t
Ey [!d9@O
The other problem in this argument is that the arguer does not rule out other factors which will lead to that the sales of recorded music declined. Perhaps, the recorded music is not the style that most local people love or it is so old-fashioned that people are not willing to buy them at the music stores. Besides, the arguer unfairly assumes that the decline of sales of recorded music is a indicator that less people love rock-and-roll music. Coincident with the development of technology, more and more people purchase recorded music on the line though Internet rather than at the music stores.
5F-cQg9}f h$? FJ9i
In addition, the arguer ignores several factors that might undermine the argument. The arguer commits a fallacy of false analogy between stations in neighboring cities and radio station KNOW. The arguer hastily concludes that the success of continuous news stations in neighboring cities indicate that radio station KNOW can reap success if it broadcast news. There may be many differences between these stations, for example, the listeners may possess different vocations, education backgrounds, or different fancy. Besides, though the survey conducted before the recent election shows that many local citizens are interesting in political, the common sense tells us that most of the people who concern political before the election will lose interesting in political when the election ends. We are not informed that that if sample in the survey includes most of listeners.U%]5VFG$?.OT5C

C0t$V"S P2f*T_ In final analysis, the argument cannot convince me that the radio station KNOW should shift its programming to news format. To strengthen this argument, the arguer should provide sufficient evidence that most of old people listeners love news, and the true cause results in the decline sales at music stores. Moreover, the evidence should also be supplied that the radio station KNOW can receive the success as the stations in neighboring cities.

Flora_2007 发表于 2008-7-9 23:38

回复 26# pkusummer 的帖子

不好意思啊
M#l]g6P9| 顺手粘错了
S-B7R#wF1v L 怎么会没有呢6hg7bfO)pQ5o
没有错啊
5AT7S ^ KGct Xt%n;fm 怎么会找不到呢

pkusummer 发表于 2008-7-10 00:20

回复 28# Flora_2007 的帖子

你的ARGU那篇和我编号是一样的。
1Z4l6ePJr 但是ISSUE那篇,我的是第10道。
{4m+k3z O!gD(x 你用的是2004年的那版黄皮书吗?

bill627 发表于 2008-7-10 08:13

[size=4]考试时间:7-15[color=red](十天之内,情况紧急)H$h YX*W#a5PJ.}
[/color]备考情况:备考一个月,已经整理出模版。时间能够控制。Q-GqL:yq7bmW\
题:TOPIC: ARGUMENT64 - The following appeared in a memo from the Dean of the College of Education at Omni State University.
x,K!figw"W1y+T!E "Only seven of our state's high schools offer even one course in Latin, but over 80 percent of the graduates who study Latin at those seven schools enroll in college. Furthermore, a recent study shows that students who have mastered Latin perform much better in logic and critical thinking. Thus, in order to increase the percentage of our high school students who graduate from college as well as to ensure that they receive a better education in critical thinking, Omni State University should begin an intensive program to prepare our future teachers to teach high school Latin."[/size]&nA;wXO+Gz
[size=4]WORDS:440           TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 2008-7-8 下午 12:03:28
J6O$CM&pd:WR,| 大纲:1、学习Latin和提高升学率的假性因果。
+N"`QZ3`1RlqR       2、研究的不可靠性。
)yTM'f!s knG;oz @       3、即使研究可靠但不一定适用于此地区。
7N.s*L8W~w 正文:/jD v3i3e9t"E_
In the memo, the Dean of the College of Education at Omni State University recommends that Omni State University should begin to prepare teachers to teach high school Latin. To support this recommendation the dean cite the following facts: (1)high schools own a high percentage of enrollment in college who offer Latin course(2)a recent study about better performance in students who master Latin. Close scrutiny of each of these facts, however, reveals that none of them lend crediable support to the recommendation.
!w8t kg4qN"h qd%f&hD2k
To begin with, the editorial observes a correlation between high percentage of enrollment and the Latin course. However nor does the author provide affirmative evidence that the success was due to the Latin course. Lacking such evidence it is entirely possible that the enrollment in college of these high schools was contributed to better student sources and hard working of their students. Or perhaps these schools possess better educational equipment than other schools. Since the author fails to