新东方作文笔记-------[强烈推荐]
[size=4][font=宋体]新东方作文笔记[/font][font=Times New Roman] ([/font][font=宋体]强烈推荐[/font][font=Times New Roman])[/font][/size][size=4][font=宋体]此笔记出自新东方杨煜[/font][font=Times New Roman](winson)[/font][font=宋体]老师[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][font=宋体]这个老师虽然名气不大[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][font=宋体]但我感觉他的课讲得很好[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][font=宋体]很负责任[/font][font=Times New Roman].[/font][/size]
[size=4][font=宋体]这个笔记一共分四个课时[/font][font=Times New Roman].[/font][font=宋体]因为他讲课喜欢穿插的讲[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][font=宋体]也就是说讲到综合部分的阅读时会讲一些写作的方法[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][color=red][font=宋体]所以我整理了一下分为综合部分[/font][font=Times New Roman],[/font][font=宋体]独立部分[/font][/color][font=Times New Roman]. [/font][font=宋体]在这四个课时里他讲了很多[color=red]写作的技巧[/color][/font][font=Times New Roman][color=red].[/color][/font][color=red][font=宋体]以及他在接受[/font][font=Times New Roman]ETS[/font][font=宋体]培训的时候[/font][font=Times New Roman]ETS[/font][font=宋体]明确提出的一些问题[/font][font=Times New Roman](ETS[/font][font=宋体]明确提出的地方我会标注[/font][font=Times New Roman]),[/font][/color][font=宋体]个人觉得对大家的写作帮助很大[/font][font=Times New Roman].[/font][/size]
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[[i] 本帖最后由 zoe. 于 2007-6-14 20:42 编辑 [/i]] [size=4][color=black][color=red]PART I 综合部分.[/color][/color][/size]
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重点:1.词语:同义词的变化很重要,不断的用相同的词语(除了中心词和无法变换的词语)要扣分.[color=blue]Webster电子软件同义词词典[/color]
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[/color] 2.格式:每一段的开头不空格,段与段间空行.
每一段的开头空四格,段与段间不空行.
3.特别提示:正式文体书写最好不要用缩写.can’t=cannot don’t=do not [color=red](这是ETS明确提出的)[/color]
4.每一段的分论点应该是由听力开头,而不是阅读.虽然OG上有阅读开头的范文,但是最好不要这么写.
5.阅读部分不可抄原文,论点要用自己的话重新总结[color=red](ETS明确指出)[/color]
6.这个部分的开头并无实际的意义,所以如果要写的话最好有一个15-20词的长句.
7.阅读文章如果来不及看,反应背景的部分可以扫过,因为它与topic sentence无关,之后用1分钟提论点,然后再话1分半钟来看论点后面的论述.最后半分钟用来推测(这个后面会讲到).
8.听力中表示反驳的词汇除了常见的那些but/however等还有new/today/change等.如果听力中有设问,那么它的答案一定要听清楚明白.
9.写作的时候给出了听力中分论点后同样需要例子来支持.一般听力中讲的时候后有例子,这个也需要记录下来..
[color=red]需要训练的技巧[/color]:在读阅读的时候就要会推测听力的论点.哪怕推得不完全对也要推.如果你无法推测就说明两种情况:1.阅读中的论点没有找到.2.文章确实是无法推测. 关于这点是winson特意花了时间训练我们的.也就是说这点可能在综合写作的部分确实是很重要.
我就拿3.10号的考题来举个例子吧.
阅读说到speed cameras可以用来取代police.
三点:1.限制司机的驾车速度.
2.取代警察.
3.为court提供更确切的证据
找到这三个论点之后你推测你就往反的方向想就可以了.1.也许speed camera未必可以限制车速; 2.可能因为种种原因它未必可以取代警察; 3.同样因为种种原因它未必可以为traffic court提供便利.
这么做看上去很简单,实际上它是有一定潜在的好处的:
1. 帮助加深考生对阅读中论点的印象.
2. 有助于在听力中更集中精力. 在听听力之前,考生往往想知道自己的推测是不是正确.在听的时候如果推对的话就要集中听那个”种种原因”到底是什么原因.如果推错的话就会更仔细的听到底它给出的是什么论点.
这里需要注意的是,不论是推对了还是推错了都要镇定的听下去,不要太兴奋或者是太失落!!![/color][/size] [size=4][color=red]PART II 独立部分[/color]
这个部分winson讲的有点散,我就分条列出来好了!
[color=red]先讲一下ETS对这个部分是怎么评分的.[/color][/size]
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[/color]1. 对比----改卷老师手边上都有从1分到满分的样本答案,改的时候这些样本答案是摊在桌上的.通过对比判断你大概是哪个分数档次.这个步骤主要是看文章的字数,结构,句子的平均长度(这个在下面会说到)以及主题句.winson说这个步骤是很重要的,如果文章给人感觉是3分档的,那么在仔细看过之后就算写得比3分档好一般也就3+,最多到4分档.所以第一印象很重要.
2. 句子长度----ETS有专门的计算句子平均长度的机器.计算方法是:总的字数/句子数=句子的平均长度.长句子不能太多,一般短句应该比长句多一点.
3. 议论段的浏览---[color=red]ETS指明[/color]好的文章应该是第一段主体段的长度>第二段主体段的长度>第三段主体段的长度.(也就是说三个议论段的字数要有明显的递减趋势,最重要的最中心的写在第一段)
[color=red]重点技巧:[/color]
1. 符号的多样性----可多用引号,连字符,问号,感叹号. [color=red]ETS明确指出连字符有加分.30分里面加1分.[/color]连字符有几种简单的构成方法:(a.)表示”再”的时候用re-,比如说re-exam; (b.)数字+n. 比如:five-layer; (c.)可用连字符表示大规模,大范围等等.后面加scale.比如:large-scale price ; (d.)几分之几. 比如:one-fifth. 同样的,多用设问句可以加强文章的生动性.比如:Can you guess the ending of this story? When the project failed, the blame was placed on all the members of the group. 再者说,引号可以用来表示(a.)否定,讽刺; (b.) 引用; (c.)强调.
2. 单词的难度和级别要一致.也就是说不能一个高中词汇,一个GRE词汇.
3. 对于举例的要求: 2 examples[color=red]ETS指明[/color]一个example是不足以说明问题的.最好是两个examples都用短事例.要lay-out,而不是deep reasoning. 同时,在example后面最好用一个长句来解释example,也就是说这个example怎么证明了你的topic sentence.
4. 不论是综合部分或者是独立部分,都要遵守短语优先原则.但是这里的短语必须要有把握才能用.
5. 写的时候最好是不要用过于绝对的或者是尖锐的词汇,比如说must, should,everyone, everytime.多用像likely, probobly, perhaps,more or less, sometimes, in a way, in the sense这样没有说死的词汇/词组.
6. 能用修辞的时候可以适当的用点修辞,但必须在有把握能用对的情况下才能用.比如: a team of people [color=red]attack[/color] the project.
7. 多用代词,代词是最好的过渡词,可以加强句子的连贯性.
8. 灵活使用词汇.可将n.-->v. 例如:surface不一定要用做n. 还可以做v.
[color=red]关于句式的问题.[/color]
1. 把能打开的词组或者是搭配拉得越开越可体现文字的表达能力.
比如:A group of people has a [color=red]wider[/color] range of knowledge,expertise, and skills[color=red] than[/color] any single indicidual is likely to possess.
2. 关于句子的强调: 多用新奇的强调,一些老调强调,比如not only…but also/ it is that….不要多用了.因为中国学生一般强调就是这么两种方式,人家也看得烦了!可以用一些比较少见的强调方式.
(a.) 用and 连接两个拼写不同但是意思相同或者是相近的词语.比如:problems and issues.
(b.) Not only ….but also的改写:not only x but x……例如: To get his or her contributions and ideas not only recognized but recognized as highly significant.
(c.) 用逗号连接两个形容词表示强调. 比如:it took many, many meetings to build the agreement.(这个方法我个人比较汗…..)
3. 尽量不要用no ,not, none等表示否定.用free from/little等代替.
4. 为了丰富符号,插入语的两个逗号可以用破折号代替.
[color=red]开头立场的问题:[/color]
1. 合格的:立场
2. [color=red]完美的[/color]:暗示了2.3.4.段的主要内容+有立场+有原因.
例如:While there is still hunger, poverty, and illiteracy on Earth, our resources should be focused not in outer space.
3. 不要用谁的优点大于谁这种句子做为观点.因为没有立场.谁的观点大于谁, 并不代表你就支持那个优点多的.[/size]
[[i] 本帖最后由 zoe. 于 2007-3-30 08:49 编辑 [/i]] :loveliness: :loveliness: 辛苦lz了！::p7
回复 #5 lsyx 的帖子
打了我一下午啊......手指都是酸的!::z8 辛苦LZ，就当练习打字速度了~~ 等我考完了我也来贴一个 呵呵 多谢lz鹈鹕灌顶呵~~ 顶阿顶，很经典 哇...楼主好人.... 六!!!!
回复 #12 colinkitty2006 的帖子
什么"六" ::z5 楼主辛苦啦 ::z5 好贴，我上XDF时就没总结出这些东东来，多谢楼主分享！回复 #9 NUNURABBIT 的帖子
能力越大责任越大！大家辛苦了！ [quote]原帖由 [i]faye1985[/i] 于 2007-3-23 00:24 发表 [url=http://www.taisha.org/bbs/redirect.php?goto=findpost&pid=8307311&ptid=796254][img]http://www.taisha.org/bbs/images/common/back.gif[/img][/url]好贴，我上XDF时就没总结出这些东东来，多谢楼主分享！ [/quote]
每个老师教得不一样的么.....
既然没有你就下下来看看就好了啊... 太感谢了=)....
LZ好样D*V* 好东西 ! 不错 听收益的 谢谢lz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *** 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽 *** *** 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽 *** *** 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽 *** [quote]原帖由 [i]realheadache[/i] 于 2007-3-29 09:44 发表 [url=http://www.taisha.org/bbs/redirect.php?goto=findpost&pid=8350116&ptid=796254][img]http://www.taisha.org/bbs/images/common/back.gif[/img][/url]
能具体解释一下例子的LAY-OUT和DEEP REASONING 的区别吗?? [/quote]
LAY-OUT就是表面铺开
DEEP REASONING就是全深究其因果
也就是说每个事例不用像写论文那样说很多很多,差不多点到就行,别人能看明白就可以! [quote]原帖由 [i]realheadache[/i] 于 2007-3-29 09:57 发表 [url=http://www.taisha.org/bbs/redirect.php?goto=findpost&pid=8350198&ptid=796254][img]http://www.taisha.org/bbs/images/common/back.gif[/img][/url]
同时,在example后面最好用一个长句来解释example,也就是说这个example怎么证明了你的topic sentence.
是用THEREFORE,~~~~~~~~的句型吗?? [/quote]
这个就不一定了,THEREFORE是用来下结论说明结果的.
比如说:
你的论点是ZOE是个好同志::z8
然后你给的例子是ZOE同学经常帮人家改文章::z3
这下你就可以解释了呀:正是因为ZOE是个好同志才会给人家改文章.:loveliness:
就是这样.::p7
你只要说明白了你的事例怎么证明了你的论点就可以了!::z5 *** 作者被禁止或删除 内容自动屏蔽 *** 按照zoe.的帖子，我对自己的一篇文章进行了修改，现在贴出来，让大家批批！
165 You have decided to give several hours of your time each month to improve the community where you live. What is one thing you will do to improve your community? Why? Use specific reasons and details to explain your choice.
第一遍：
As a member of my community where I live, sometimes I just wonder what I can do to improve it even though I have only several hours per month to do this. Recently, I saw a blind person was hit by a car when I was going to cross the street, and eventually I found that I could be a volunteer to help those people in need to cross the road safely.
Firstly, many people in my community actually have some difficulties in their daily lives, especially those old and blind. Most time they are helpless when they are traveling alone. Those old people are physically weak, and sometimes could not take care of themselves when they are crossing the road especially in the busy hour, such as morning and afternoon. Also, those blind could not see the red lights or the green ones when they are intending to go to the opposite side of the road, thus they are in great need of help when facing this situation.
Secondly, as the world grows much faster than ever before, the traffic becomes heavier and heavier so the drivers could have less time to respond those unimagined cases. Also they could not stop their cars immediately when they see somebody is going to cross the road, or the car behind will hit it, causing another serious accident. As a result, a tragedy sometimes happens, causing many misfortunes to the families and society. Considering this, I would like to make my efforts to avoid this tragedy as possible as I can.
Thirdly, because I just have only a little time every month to help the others, I could not choose the careers which need much time, such as taking care of the old, being a family tutor for the children. In this situation, helping people to cross the road would be a considerable good choice since I could decide when to do this according to my time schedule without any restrictions, and I think this could fit me best.
Being a part of my local community, I could use my spare time to help the old or blind people when they are crossing the roads. I will be proud that I could reduce the traffic accidents with my efforts based on my practical situation. (382/14)
第二遍：
What can I do to improve my community as being a member of it? Recently, after seeing a blind person hit by a car when crossing the street, I decide to become a volunteer to help those people in need to cross the road safely. It could be quite a good choice considering their practical difficulties, the present situation and my personal condition.
Fristly, many people in my community actually have some difficulties when they are traveling alone, especially those old and blind. They are physically weak and helpless, thus could not take care of themselves in the busy hour, for instance in the morning or afternoon. Besides, those blind are not able to see the red or lights when they are intending to go to the opposite side. Considering their actual needs, my efforts might be quite useful for them.
Secondly, the traffic becomes heavier and heavier when many, many people own their private cars. However, they might have less time to respond some unexpected situations. Even though they could have enough time to stop the car, the driver behind them has not enough time to do the same, and eventually cause another serious accident. As a result, a tragedy happens, bringing many misfortunes to their families. Being a volunteer, I would try my best to avoid this disaster emerging.
Thirdly, since I just have only a little spare time each month, I could not choose the things which requires much time, such as taking care of the orphans, being a family tutor for the poor. In this situation, helping people to cross the road would be a considerable good choice for I could decide when according to my time-schedule without any restriction.
As a part of my local community, I would like to spend my spare time on helping the old or blind to cross the road. I will feel proud that with my efforts I could reduce the accidents based on my practical situation. (327/16)
不过我还是有些疑问，自己文章的句子似乎太长了，第一篇382字（word下统计，包括标点，不知道ETS的文字要求是否包括标点），才14句，平均每句话27个字；即使第二篇修改后327字，也才16句，没有达到13～18字/句的最佳要求。
另外关于格式格式:每一段的开头不空格,段与段间空行.每一段的开头空四格,段与段间不空行. 是指有两个格式可以自由选择吗？ 收藏了慢慢看:loveliness: [quote]原帖由 [i]realheadache[/i] 于 2007-3-29 15:35 发表 [url=http://www.taisha.org/bbs/redirect.php?goto=findpost&pid=8352641&ptid=796254][img]http://www.taisha.org/bbs/images/common/back.gif[/img][/url]
关于楼上的解释有没有什么好句型可一用啊?? [/quote]
怎么说呢,好的句型我一下子也想不到
但是最好不要像我举的例子那样直打直的解释说"因为ZOE是好同志才会给人家改作文"
我觉得可以说"ZOE给人家改作文就证明了ZOE是个好同志"
具体的语言你就自己组织了,没有什么具体的题目我也只能解释到这个程度了.
不好意思!
回复 #28 yunzhou26 的帖子
你的作文建议你另外开贴子贴,贴在这里很少有人来看的.至于你那个字数的要求,13-18,说实话,我也从来都没有达到,不知道是不是我们的句子包含的分句太多,以前我也有过疑问这个地方.而且也有人发短信来问过我这个事情.看来我得把这条去掉了.::z8
格式随便选的,但是我个人建议你选第一种!
更加清晰一点.:loveliness: 多谢，这篇文章发在这里也就没有打算有人会帮我批改什么的，自己只是表示一下按照作文笔记的有些条款修改一下自己作文的结果。
不过尽管如此我想自己的作文还是有许多要修改的地方，昨天jiutouniao1983就说了我的作文中就有不少中国英语的痕迹。
感谢楼主的分享，让我知道文章修改和努力的方向。 LS的,给你大概看了下
[[i] 本帖最后由 zoe. 于 2007-3-30 15:17 编辑 [/i]] What can I do to improve my community as being a member of it? Recently, after seeing a blind person hit by a car when crossing the street, I decide to become a volunteer to help those people in need to cross the road safely. It could be quite a good choice considering their practical difficulties, the present [color=blue]traffic(加上效果更好，更加对仗） [/color]situation and my personal condition.(这个开头很赞.尤其是最后三个并列,个人感觉不错.)
Fristly, many people in my community actually have some difficulties when they are traveling alone, especially those([color=red]这里我觉得最好是用the,the你可以指代一群人或者是一类人,如果用those的话总觉得还是应该在old and blind后面家个people,那样就显得累赘了.)[/color] [color=blue]（这里后面是people，我是有意识省略了，前面有了people）[/color]old and blind. They are physically weak and helpless, thus could[color=red](为什么是过去式?)[/color] [color=blue](could不仅仅是过去时，在这种情况下更多的是表示一种可能的意思，推测)[/color] not take care of themselves in the busy[color=red](一般这种交通的高峰是说rush hour)[/color] hour, for instance in the morning or afternoon. Besides, those blind are not able to see the red or [color=red]([/color][color=red]是不是少了一个green?)[/color] [color=blue](这个的确是我忘记了，写的时候明明记得有green)[/color]lights when they are intending to go to the opposite side. Considering their actual needs, my efforts might be quite useful for them.
Secondly, the traffic becomes heavier and heavier when many, many[color=red](这里这么用我觉得你没有突出一个change,要不就改成more and more,要不就在cars后面加个now) [/color][color=blue]（这里我觉得more and more更好，用many, many是为了按照你的介绍 用逗号连接两个形容词表示强调. 比如:it took many, many meetings to build the agreement 来写的，不过有点画虎不成反累犬了） [/color]people own their private cars. However, they might have less time to respond some unexpected situations. Even though they could have enough time to stop the car, the driver behind them has not enough time to do the same, and eventually cause another serious accident. As a result, a tragedy happens, bringing many misfortunes to their families[color=red](这个their你是指谁啊?照你这一段前面的几句话读下来这里their就是指driver了,如果你这里讲到的是对driver的家人的伤害明显和你的主题就不合了,如果你这里的their要指the old and blind or people who are in need of help,那怎么又扯上他们的家人了??/看不出你这里的逻辑).[/color][color=blue] (这里的their我是指的driver，发生了车祸，对司机自然是悲剧，无论是挨撞的还是撞人家的，自然是their，从这个角度上来说帮助old and blind，也为司机解决了一定的麻烦，也是在为社区服务啊，你说对吗？第一段是讲弱势群体，第二段主要讲为司机解决后顾之忧）[/color] Being a volunteer, I would try my best to avoid this disaster emerging.
Thirdly, since I just have only a little spare time each month, I could not choose the[color=red](这里这个the不需要)[/color] [color=blue]（我觉得这里的the要和不要没有特别大的问题，可数名次的单数前是要冠词的，但是对于复数形式应该说可以不要冠词，但有了冠词并不是错误的，而是特指一定的情况）[/color]things which requires[color=red](things and requires???)[/color] [color=blue]（这里应该是require,笔误没有发现）[/color]much time, such as taking care of the orphans, being a family tutor for the poor. In this situation, helping people to cross the road would be a considerable good choice for I could decide when according to my time-schedule without any restriction.
As a part of my local community, I would like to spend my spare time on helping the old or blind to cross the road. I will feel proud that with my efforts I could reduce the accidents based on my practical situation.
首先对于你的辛勤指导，我十分感谢。
其次以上是我对于你批注的回应，可能彼此的意见不是太一致，仅供商榷，互相探讨一下吧！
另外我觉得如果这样的文章只能有23分的话（还是在将来），那说明我还是得更加的努力，我觉得我 Integrated Wring 可能还写不出这样的文章。
如果这样的话，总分要达到100难度可能非常大！
[[i] 本帖最后由 yunzhou26 于 2007-3-30 16:35 编辑 [/i]] 恩~ 很有心诶~
这么多字，
辛苦了~
谢谢~！ 3Q~~~:loveliness: thank you for sharing 支持一下，收了 好东东啊 ::11 知道作文的评分标准就比较好下手了。::11